Sunday, February 19, 2017

Sunday funnies

If I were a burglar, I confess that a guard squirrel would probably scare me more than a dog would.

Chicken thieves.

(H/T on the above stories, Mrs. Paco)

Looking for a good read? Try one of these.

I hate it when that happens: "Contractor guts wrong Fort Worth house".

C'mon, you gonna be in there all day?

Raccoon hitches a ride on the "gravy train"...



Worst campaign speech ever...

Friday, February 17, 2017

Happy Feet Friday

Fats Domino lays down some of that New Orleans eight-to-the-bar with Hey la Bas Boogie.

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Shep Smith, fool

Shep Smith to Donald Trump: "No sir, we are not fools..."

When you rant about not being a fool, the froth flying from your lips pretty much renders your claim null and void.

Let's face it, mainscream media, Donald Trump is twisting your OODA loop into something resembling a balloon dog.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

The price of liberty

Man, no sooner do we hand the Democrats a defeat and embarrass the RINOs than we face probably the most deadly enemy of them all: the deep state.

More from Adam Kredo at Washington Free Beacon.

Coexist...or else!



(Cheerfully pinched from DoublePlusUndead - which, if you're not reading everyday, you're just not one of the cool kids)

Monday, February 13, 2017

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Sunday funnies

Old duffer fights off alligator with putter.


(H/T: Moonbattery)

Good advice (H/T: Clash Daily)...



Engagement ring tattoos (for those who are pretty damned sure their union will be permanent).

Did your ex-wife leave her wedding dress behind? It makes great snow camo (H/T: Odd Stuff)...






Saturday, February 11, 2017

Dear Mr. President

Here's one foreigner I'd be pleased to see you let in. I'll even sponsor her!

Throw him in jail or run him out of the country

Last week I asked why George Soros couldn't be prosecuted under RICO. In a good roundup of Soros' diverse efforts at worldwide destabilization, David Solway suggests it's doable.

Obnoxious defender of Sharia (and ignorant poseur) is the new face of feminism

Daniel Pipes provides some interesting background on Linda Sarsour, one of the organizers of the papier mache vagina parade that took place after Trump's inauguration. Here's a taste:
I learned about Sarsour’s ignorance of history. She promotes a fantasy notion of Islam’s founder, Muhammad: “Our prophet was a racial justice activist, a human rights activist, a feminist in his own right. He was a man that cared about the environment. He cared about animal rights. … He was also the first victim of Islamophobia.” Her musings on American slavery caught my eye: “The sacrifice [that] the black Muslim slaves went through in this country is nothing compared to Islamaphobia [sic] today.”
Yep, that sure sounds like ol' Mo, doesn't it?

Friday, February 10, 2017

Happy Feet Friday

Fats Waller playing one of his signature tunes, Honeysuckle Rose.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Well, that was quick work

"A wanted sex offender who disappeared after leaving a federal prison in Virginia was caught Wednesday in the District, police said."

Color me astonished. I figured this guy would have no trouble at all blending into a crowd:



Ah, facial tattoos. One of those things that always seem like a good idea at the time.

Murderer of Hillary's career identified

We all figured it was Obama or Comey or Putin. Whoever would have guessed that it was actually...Bruce Springsteen? But the guy has confessed: "A Letter of Apology From Bruce Springsteen for Letting Trump Win".
So I ask again: Could I have made a difference in the last election? Some people think I’m one of the few people who actually could have.

It’s been suggested that in the weeks and months leading up to the election, I should have followed Trump around from rally to rally, especially in September and October when he was hitting the Rust Belt states hard. After all, those are supposed to be “my” people, too.
Yeah, but they're not "your" people, Bruce. They're genuine blue-collar folk, whereas you, with your $20 million mansion and all the other perks that come from being a successful recording artist, haven't been blue-collar for decades. Trump isn't blue-collar either, but he seems to genuinely feel their pain, whereas they were just fodder for your dreary lyrics.

This is my favorite part:
Now, just because you could have shot Hitler, that doesn’t mean you are guilty because you didn’t, right? I mean, probably 5 million Germans could have killed Hitler at one point, but we can’t condemn every one of them, right?

And by the way, I’m not suggesting we kill anyone! This is just a comparison—an analogy. Or is it a metaphor?
I dunno. Maybe it's a simile. Or hyperbole. I'm putting my money on It's Just Bruce Springsteen Jerking Off In Front of a Giant Mental Poster of Himself (No offense, dude. That's just an analogy. Or maybe a metaphor).

If there's a prize for the Most Nauseating Example of Pretentious Narcissism Published in a Newspaper or Magazine, you ought to win in a walk.

And perhaps this is heretical - certainly it is to your fans - but I always thought your voice positively sucked. The slight quaver that is probably intended to represent passion always struck me as stemming from a cluster of nodules on your larynx, and the raspiness that you no doubt believe conveys an authentic workin' man vibe sounds like the morning after a long night power-sucking smoke from bad weed through a clogged kick hole on a bong.

Chuck Norris visits Israel

Israel now "indestructible", says Prime Minister Netanyahu.

Today's Chuck Norris fact: When Chuck Norris was born, he drove his mom home from the hospital.

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Maxine Waters' intellect continues to impress

Congressthing and brainiac Maxine Waters says Donald Trump should be impeached because...well, pretty much just because.

The sheer cognitive power of Ms. Waters' thought-box is amazing - sharp, like a hot knife through...oh, I dunno, a brick or an engine block or something.

Tim Blair uses reverse psychology on the progs

He provides them with excellent advice, secure in the knowledge that they can be counted on to studiously ignore it.

Monday, February 6, 2017

Assortment

Trump is the star in this "All your base are belong to us"* video.




*On the outside chance that you may be unfamiliar with this meme, here's some background.


An outstanding explanation of why Trump isn't Hitler from Regie's Blog. Just a taste:
But if you study enough about it, you realize the guy vetting and banning refugees is probably not Hitler …the guy CREATING refugees probably is.

H/T to Scott Adams, who, incidentally, has formally broken with his alma mater.


Naturally, progs had to politicize the Super Bowl, and the Pats were particularly unpopular this time around because Tom Brady and the Pats' owner are supporters of Donald Trump. Here's one of the funniest ripostes to the leftists' political posturing.

Congressional genius and noted geographer, Maxine Waters, has just floated the novel idea that Korea and Crimea are the same place.

A judge in Travis County - which is kind of a minimum security concentration camp for liberals in Texas - wore a pussy hat in court.



Via Moonbattery.

Why isn't this guy a target of a RICO investigation?

Kurt Schlichter tells it straight about what progs want normal people to do. In a word...

Sunday, February 5, 2017

Unbelievable

Well, no, of course it's not really unbelievable, I just saw it happen, but...unbelievable.

Congratulations to Tom Brady and the New England Patriots on their victory, which included the most astonishing comeback in Super Bowl history.

Oops!

I have somehow contrived to delete my blog roll (I was in the process of removing some sites that haven't had any posts in over a year, and I did it wrong). I'll try to create a new one when I have the chance.

Hey, did you know that Audi believes in equal pay for men and women?

One hopes the company hasn't just recently come around to this view, but, as Jack Baruth brilliantly explains, Audi's Super Bowl commercial is really about something else altogether.

Sunday funnies

It's an Idaho thing: "Moose rescued after fall into Idaho basement".

Now there's hope for lonely orangutans: "Dutch orangutans test out computer dating".

(H/T to Mrs. Paco for the above two stories)

Things are pretty slow in Serov, Russia.

Elsewhere in Russia, it looks like vodka is still considered the breakfast of champions.

First impressions can sometimes be a little off.

The author of this biology textbook bailed just in time.



Now they tell us!


Friday, February 3, 2017

Happy Feet Friday

Considered by some to be the first genuine rock & roll tune, here's Ike Turner and Jackie Brenston with Rocket 88.

Thursday, February 2, 2017

The world turned upside down

Perhaps nothing so clearly illustrates the sheer banality and fraudulence of the political left – and, I suspect, the probable self-awareness of the banality and fraudulence possessed by leftists themselves, however much they may practice denial – as the increasingly shrill calls for defiance of the law. Suddenly, the working definition of democracy is any act of violence – from riots to military coups – against a government controlled by people whose opinions happen to offend you, and against the people who put that government in power. Now, every neurotic Hollywood liberal, every parlor socialist in academe, every lazy, parasitical, self-styled anarchist sees himself (or herself, as the case may be) as a maquisard, a hero of the resistance, a guerilla-fighter ready to take down the arch-Nazi Trump.

Meanwhile, the disloyal opposition in the Senate and the House rises to dizzying new heights of absurdity. Senator Schumer, his sleek cheeks glistening with crocodile tears, indulges himself in spouting the hoariest oratorical corn by vowing to help Lady Liberty hold her torch high (the better to light the way for the Islamist troglodytes who would gladly slaughter his constituents). And Nancy Pelosi practically accuses Trump's SCOTUS nominee, a man of intelligence and integrity approved for his current job unanimously by the Senate, of wanting to pour arsenic in our rivers and burn mountains of oily rags in our parks; no doubt it is only a matter of time before it occurs to him to require that the walls of all children's nurseries, public and private, be slathered in chocolate-flavored, lead-based paint.

The rising of the imbecilariat is a wonder to behold, my friends, a giant, gaudy carnival of "progressive" freakishness, stupendous mendacity, intellectual contortion and brown-shirted thuggery. What a relief, therefore, that most of these angry nitwits have thus far spurned opportunities for arming themselves under the protections afforded by our beloved Second Amendment. Not to say that they won't acquire weapons, going forward, but they are several tens of millions of guns behind. This deficiency may not hinder their chances as much as one might imagine, of course, if there is, indeed, a large cabal of Obamist generals sitting around a telephone in a basement in the Pentagon, just waiting for Sarah Silverman to give the word. But I shall keep a good thought.



(Image courtesy of the excellent Bookworm Room).

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

This should dovetail nicely with the Democrats' commitment to early release of prisoners

"Inmates inside a Delaware prison where four staff members were being held hostage reached out to a newspaper in two phone calls to explain their concerns, including the leadership of the U.S., educational opportunities, rehabilitation and how the state spends money on prisons. Prisoners at the James T. Vaughn Correctional Center funneled the calls Wednesday to The News Journal in Wilmington with the help of one inmate's fiancee and another person's mother. The mother told the paper her son was among the hostages. In that call, an inmate said their reasons 'for doing what we're doing' included 'Donald Trump [emphasis mine - P.]. Everything that he did. All the things that he's doing now. We know that the institution is going to change for the worse.'"

Exclusive, from Paco World News Daily (PWND), is the following video showing a typical prisoner's reaction to the news that Donald Trump nominated Neil Gorsuch to the Supreme Court...



Fortunately for Nancy Pelosi, there's not an IQ test for congress critters

On Trump's SCOTUS pick, Nancy had this to say: “If You Breathe Air, Drink Water, Eat Food… This Is a Very Bad Decision”.

Well, I don't do any of those things, so I'm fine with it.

Update: Veeshir corrects my mistake (from the comments): "Joke's on you! There is an IQ test for Congress. Unfortunately, it's an upper limit (91) and not a lower limit."