Thursday, October 7, 2010

Paco Enterprises endorses R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr. for mayor of Chicago

The suave, witty and impishly handsome editor-in-chief of the American Spectator has decided to challenge Rahm Emanuel in Chicago's mayoral race. This blog offers its unqualified support to Mr. Tyrrell’s candidacy.

What a grand victory this would be! Chicago has not had a Republican mayor since the heady days of prohibition, when William “Big Bill” Thompson – friend of used-furniture salesman Al Capone – held sway. Imagine the shock the people would feel waking up the day after the election and finding themselves saddled with honest government. One wonders if they’d know what to make of it. Is it possible, you may ask, for an electorate so thoroughly accustomed to corruption to consider an alternative?

It is, indeed, possible, say I. Even hogs, used to wallowing in the mire, must enjoy a good hosing down now and again, and Mr. Tyrrell is just the jet of pure, cleansing water that the people of Chicago might find refreshing. Yes, after generations of dirty Democratic misrule, the time – not to mention the body politic – is ripe for change, and the times have produced the man.

R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr: The next mayor of Chicago


RebeccaH said...

If Chicago (named after a wild onion, as a matter of fact), were to somehow miraculously find itself with an honest government, I feel quite sure that end of Illinois would ascend to Heaven, taking a large part of Lake Michigan with it. Not that I'm expecting anything like that.

Paco said...

No, ain't gonna happen, but it's fun to dream about!

bingbing said...

Good luck to him. The bloke who sits next to me at work hails from Chicago and from what I've heard, the windy city needs another Democrat like Al Gore needs another house.

Yojimbo said...

I'd demand a recount if I was him lest he suddenly become fatal accident prone.

Steve Skubinna said...

I think pigs like to get hosed off just so they can get a fresh coat of mud.

tw: conybran. Not ever having been a fan of Raisin Bran, I don't think substituting rabbit is a great idea. Unless it's some sort of contraction for Conan O'Brien, and I still don't think it's a great idea.

Minicapt said...

And then there are the pigs who just want to get hosed.