Thursday, May 19, 2011

Republicans search for the Higgs-Boson of electoral success in 2012

I was reading this interview with nuclear scientist Rolf-Dieter Heuer at The European web site, and, while it is interesting in its own right – among other things, Heuer’s reflections on the intersection of science and faith are more thoughtful than Stephen Hawking’s recent flippant vaporings – what excited me was finding a neat metaphor to describe the Republicans’ search for the optimal candidate in a crowded and diverse field of contenders. First, here’s Heuer:
In the area of particle physics, we need many years to run our experiments and analyze the data. In the past fifty years, we have developed the Standard Model of particle physics. It describes the microcosm as we know it: the matter particles and the forces between them. But we are still missing one cornerstone to explain how elementary particles get their mass. We think that the Higgs mechanism could provide the answer to that question. The manifestation of that mechanism is something called the Higgs Boson – a particle that is thought to exist but hasn’t been found in experiments yet. Our goal is to find the Higgs Boson. If we succeed, then we will conclude the theory of the Standard Model [emphasis mine].
Republicans have most components of their “model” in place: opposition to irresponsible government spending and the unchecked growth of government power, an acknowledgment of the need to reform entitlements, the necessity of restoring the idea of American exceptionalism, reverence for the constitution and individual freedom. The missing piece – the Higgs-Boson – is the standard-bearer – or rather, the optimal standard bearer, since there will be one in any event (optimal or not).

So, who do you think our Higgs-Boson is? Or is there one at all?


Michael Lonie said...

I favor Bobby Jindal.

bruce said...

Thomas Sowell has all the ideas we (everyone!) need right now in just the right balance. But he's not in the race. So I would judge the runners by how closely they compare with Sowell - he's my Higgs-Boson.

wv: tradmen. Yeah, traditional men!

Fitzroy said...

What we need is a glib, youthful, and energetic standard-bearer. The Democrats find them all the time: JFK, Clinton, John Edwards, the Won. They don't worry about their obvious flaws because those guys all have the one necessary skill of articulating and putting a friendly face on a fantasy.

The Republicans usually require their candidates to toil in vineyard first and prove their mettle with substantive accomplishments. Hence the dearth of immediately appealing figures with no known downside.

(That is why Sarah Palin drives Democrats crazy. She has all the qualities that Democrats value in their candidates, but says all the wrong things. It scares them that they have never been able to find a female candidate with anything approaching Palin's appeal.)

Our youthful and articulate candidates (e.g. Palin, Ryan, Jindal) all have a known downside; they have records and have staked out clear positions. Rubio may be the lone exception.

So who should we nominate? Beats me. I'd like to see another Reagan come along, but I'll settle for anyone who can match his electoral college performance in 1984. The perfect candidate is any Republican who goes into office with an overwhelming mandate to undo the wreckage of Obama. . . .

Oh, alright. The answer is Ryan/Rubio.

richard mcenroe said...

Newt! Party like it's 1995!

missred said...

Why Paco, of course. after that, Rick Perry

rinardman said...

missred: "Why Paco, of course."

Only one problem, has he ever shown a real birth certificate?

WV: plenonse- a shortening of "plenty of nonsense"-the babblings of a knee-jerk liberal.


missred said...

Only one problem, has he ever shown a real birth certificate?have we asked for one?

rinardman said...

Probably a moot point anyway, missred. Would he give up his position as the most powerful man in the country, head of Paco Enterprises, to be just the POTUS?


Paco said...

Miss Red: Oh, you're right! I was forgetting about myself.

Rinardman: I was considering outsourcing the POTUS position on a contract basis to my uncle Jack (he's getting tired of that prison guard job down in North Carolina).

missred said...

devastating headlines are waiting

ps, none of my wv have been nearly as clever as all of yours. or maybe i am just not as clever (shimetti)

Michael Lonie said...

"So who should we nominate?"

Cuthulhu, of course. Why settle for the lesser evil? We can feed him on Democrats at least until 2021.

rinardman said...

Well, Paco, prison guard is a definite step up from "community organizer"!
He's...I've got my vote.


Paco said...

Not to worry. I'm only farming the small stuff out to him - like presiding over state dinners. At 250 pounds, he's quite a trencherman, so he ought to find that task right up his alley.