Saturday, June 25, 2011

Heart of darkness

It is a savage land, a veritable moonscape, almost three thousand uncivilized miles stretching between the fragile civilized coastal regions, filled with superstitious tribal hostility and the bonfires of devil-worshipers, something to make Road Warrior look like a Disney travelogue.

That's right, I'm talking about Middle America. Flyover country. The fruited plains. The hunting ground of slope-headed neanderthals. Or at least, that's the way New York Times media reporter David Carr sees things. Bible-thumpers and gun-clingers, most of them probably the product of incest, I bet. You can tell, you know. The genetic deterioration shows. For example, here's an obvious specimen of Homo Missouriensis:



Oh, wait. That's not a Missouri aborigine. That's...David Carr. One of our cultural and intellectual betters. The aforementioned reporter for the NYT. Here's another picture of him looking - in his own words - "kind of dickish".



I guess we should all scurry into our holes, now that we've been dissed by a former crack addict.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

The worst part of this to me is that a large part of the audiance is applauding these fools. I think that this is an indication of what the liberal media and Hollywood types think of us. They believe we are not smart enough to make our own decisions, but should do what they tell us to do.

SwampWoman said...

Yeah, another one of those superior geniuses that need a GPS device in order to cross the street. Color me unimpressed.

Mr. Bingley said...

He's qualified to run for my town council.

rinardman said...

Apparently Minnesota isn't considered part of the land of sloping foreheads? Or, maybe Carr having been born and raised there raised the collective IQ of the whole state.

BTW, Obama's mother was born in Kansas. I guess that explains his sloping forehead!

*

prairiecat55kc said...

Good Lord, I have family in all the worst places! (thank you, God)

Also, referencing the crack-head article - having known quite a few in my time, there is very little 'charming' about them or their habits or addictions. In fact, there is very little 'charming' about addiction.

Least charming of them all is the addiction to the idea that addicts are somehow 'better' than the non-never-addicted. Really pathetic Egotism of the Highest Order.

In my (seldom) humble opinion. 8)

Paco said...

Great points, Prairie Cat.

Stosh2 said...

Not to worry, exactly three people actually read the NYT except for these wonderful nuggets of paranoia and ignorance. Great advertisement for a failing business.

RebeccaH said...

David Carr's brutally honest memoir of the years in which he was a gun-toting crack-cocaine addict who slapped women around is somehow charming.

Only a New York news writer could write that without dying of shame.

Steve Skubinna said...

Well Rebecca, however low he sank at least he never voted Republican!

Kartman said...

Steve you are a fool.

richard mcenroe said...

Scum then, scum now. But hey, at least he got hooked on a cool urban drug. Thank god it wasn't oxycontin.

Paco said...

Kartmen: Down, boy! Steve's being sarcastic.

kartman said...

I suppose that I am like one of the people that they are talking about on the video. I am too stupid to recognize when someone is being sarcastic. Steve, I am sorry for misunderstanding. I am not slope headed but I am bald headed. Again I apologize for my remark.

Col. Milquetoast said...

One of the signs of a sufferer of Middleaphobia is a willingness to ignore the discredited nature of phrenology and to ignore the actual shapes of the middle's heads but to insist that it applies.

He "knows" its true because it involves people with which he has a political disagreement.

(btw, is this the new civility?)

JorgXMcKie said...

How do we know he's a reformed crack addict? Would you take a crack addict's word for it that he's quit using? I wouldn't.

And on the video he looks like a smirking, pencil-necked asshole. His formative years in MN were probably spent being 'pantsed' and having his head given 'swirlies'. Probably totally prepared him to work for the NYT. [Am I the only one to think that 'Pinch' was probably a target of the 'thugs' at his private school?]