“I know what — it’s widely believed that CBS, NBC, ABC — chocked full of liberals. Not true. What it is chock full of is people who wanted to give honest news, straightforward news and voted both ways in many elections.Oh, you mean Walter Cronkite – “the most trusted man in America” – was an exception? And that your own election-year, eleventh hour attempt to do a hit on George Bush, based on transparently fraudulent documents, was just a fluke?
I wonder if even Mrs. Rather pays attention to this guy anymore.
Breakfast room, the Rather apartment in New York. Mrs. Rather (Jean) is sitting at the table, eating oatmeal and reading a newspaper. Dan enters the room.
Dan [leaning down and giving Mrs. Rather a buss on the cheek]: Courage!
Jean: Honestly, Dan! Can’t you just say “good morning” like a normal person? And take off that stupid sweater. We’re almost in June.
Dan: Say, I heard the phone ring a while ago. It wasn’t…uh…
Jean [sighing heavily and folding up her newspaper]: No, it wasn’t Mary Mapes! I told you, I had her number blocked. Ever since her last shot at trying to get you to go after poor Mr. Bush. Remember? The photos of him in his National Guard uniform, snorting coke in the cockpit of that airplane? In the early 70s?
Dan: Listen, I think she was on to something.
Jean: Danny Boy, the photos were taken with a digital camera, and the plane was, if I recall, an F-35 Lightning II – which has only been around since 2006. The pictures were obviously fake.
Dan: Jean, there’s an old saying in the news business: photoshopped, but true.
Jean: Yeah, well, there's an old saying about broken-down newsmen, too.
Dan: What's that?
Jean: "What's the frequency, Kenneth?" Don't make me lay a baseball bat upside your head.
Dan: Ok, ok. Did I get any fan mail yesterday?
Jean: No, why should you? He wrote just last week.
Dan: Boy, how soon people forget!
Jean: Not all of them. People who know who I am still snicker at me behind my back in the checkout line at the supermarket.
Dan [patting his wife affectionately on the head]: Well, I did tell you that those new stretch pants made your butt look big.
Jean: What?!?
Dan: Now, honey...heh...put the bat down. I'm a newsman. I have to tell the truth. [Dashing out the back door] See you later. I have to see a man about a memo!
I have absolutely no doubt Dan the Plan and his fellow news benders think they're perfectly unbiased, professional journalists.
ReplyDeleteWhich is all the proof you need, that they aren't.
I'm amazed that Dan Rather still has a gig. He's about as relevant as Jimmy Carter's hear aid.
ReplyDeleteHe's right. They voted for Obama and agsinst McCain.
ReplyDeleteI voted against Obama but not really for McCain.
Dan Rather is completely irrelevant. Jon Stewart is increasingly so.
ReplyDelete