Thursday, February 28, 2013

If you're Joe Biden's mailman... might want to wear body armor, just to be on the safe side.
“Well, you know, my shotgun will do better for you than your AR-15, because you want to keep someone away from your house, just fire the shotgun through the door.”
Update: : Can’t wait for Biden’s next awesome piece of advice on home defense; probably he’ll be telling us that, once we’ve shot the guy on our front porch, we need to be sure and drag him inside the house. Or, after blasting away with our 12 ga., maybe we should position the body in the yard with a gun in his hand in such a way as to suggest suicide.

* * * * * * *

Investigating officer: So, Mr. Vice President, you’re saying that you heard a noise in your front yard, came out to look around, and you saw the deceased lying there with a gun in his hand?

Biden: That’s right, officer. Just flat on his back with a handgun pointed at his own head. Looks like suicide to me.

IO: Hmm…that’s strange. His own gun is a Glock semi-automatic pistol, and it’s still carrying a fully-loaded magazine. The face of the deceased is full of holes, but you’re suggesting that he shot himself multiple times, and then reloaded? Is that what you’re saying?

Biden: Yeah, sure looks like it. I suppose you guys see this kind of thing every day.

IO: A lot less frequently than you might imagine - particularly among police officers who are just going door to door handing out flyers on missing children.

Biden: Guess the, er, pathos of the whole thing finally got to him.

IO: Possibly. In any event, I’m sure the chief would be very interested in hearing your theories on this shooting down at the station. Would you come with me, please? We’ll take a nice little drive in the great big patrol car down to see the friendly police chief. Just duck your head getting into the back seat…Mind your plugs.

Biden: Can you turn on the siren? And the flashing lights? I love that stuff!

Update II: Haw! H/T to JeffS for this one:


rinardman said...


I don't even know how to respond to such blatant stupidity, anymore.

SwampWoman said...

Well, that would certainly help the post office deal with that pesky pension problem.....

Spiny Norman said...



What's astonishing is that the Proggs don't even realize how stupid he is. They aren't embarrassed by his idiocy at all - it simply doesn't register. If they even acknowledged the Gaffe-O-Matic, it would mean that their Messiah made a poor choice, that he is imperfect.

House of cards and all that...

mojo said...

I'm amazed that he still knows how to breathe without assistance. No brain function at all.

JeffS said...

That's another felony offense Sheriff Joe is advising Americans to commit.

Too bad he isn't committed himself. In a padded cell.

JeffS said...

I should also note that Sheriff Joe makes Dick Cheney look like
Quigley Down Under.

Anonymous said...

Looks like Uncle Joe's been hittin the likker with Granny Clampett again.

Anonymous said...

Deborah said...JeffS, Dick Cheney is Quigley.

Maybe women service members should be issued shotguns. Those big bad rifles they use now are sooo unwieldly...not. No can't do that because then everyone wouldn't be equal.

I'd love to test any of the anti-gunners to a range, give 'em pop-up targets, and only 10 rounds.

RebeccaH said...

I've pretty much figured out Slow Joe is the court jester. He's just missing the hat with all the little bells.

JeffS said...

Keep a sharp eye out, Paco! Bloomberg may be casting his Nanny State eye on Virginia.

mojo said...

"Gun up, pard! There's Federales ta put outta our misery!"

JorgXMcKie said...

Unbelievably my liberal colleagues [many with PhDs] still defend Biden.

They frequently compare his gaffes to Reagan. I've offered to fight a duel with quotes, but they refuse. I wonder why?

["Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall" vs "Shoot through the door" may indicate why they're so unwilling.