Monday, July 29, 2013

There’s such a thing as being too American, you know



Michael Shulan, one of the Big Apple’s mincing cultural exquisites, was plucked from the teeming masses of the city’s intellectualoids to serve as the creative director for the 911 Memorial Museum, in which capacity he originally tried to bar the display of an iconic photo of firemen raising a U.S. flag amidst the destruction.
Michael Shulan, the museum’s creative director, was among staffers who considered the Tom Franklin photograph too kitschy and “rah-rah America,” according to “Battle for Ground Zero” (St. Martin’s Press) by Elizabeth Greenspan, out next month.

“I really believe that the way America will look best, the way we can really do best, is to not be Americans so vigilantly and so vehemently,” Shulan said.
Hmmm…m’yes. Quite so, old top. The photo is merely a third-rate, derivative expression of the image of U.S. Marines raising the flag on Mt. Suribachi – which is, itself, nothing but a paean to American jingoism (and let’s not forget to congratulate ourselves on being among the relative few who know how “paean” is pronounced, let alone what it means, what?) Not to mention that the picture is…how shall I put this…insufficiently representative of America’s rich racial diversity. Not quite the thing, at all.

Mr. Shulan continues:
“My concern, as it always was, is that we not reduce [9/11] down to something that was too simple, and in its simplicity would actually distort the complexity of the event, the meaning of the event.”
Oh, absolutely, my dear fellow! There must be layers and layers of unexplored complexity, irony, and nuance that belie the superficial explanation that this unfortunate incident was due to the decision by Muslim terrorists to murder as many Americans as possible in one spectacular blow. Of course, the Muslim terrorists themselves have stated that it was as simple as that, but can they – poor, confused chaps that they are - legitimately claim to be the sole authors of this seminal act of violence? Should we really overlook our own role in what was arguably one of the most dramatic and tragic examples of entrapment in history?

Say, here’s an idea: why not photoshop a trio of proto-occupiers on top of the rubble, holding a banner with the words, “We apologize on behalf of America for our crusade against Islam”, or perhaps, “We asked for it!”

Or better yet: how about if a band of patriotic citizens bundles this bozo off to the docks, and heaves him onto a trash barge? Or is that too…simple, too lacking in complexity? Well, then, remove his trousers, paint his buttocks bright orange and epoxy a plastic daffodil between his butt-cheeks.” How’s that for “complexity” and “meaning”?

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

'Well, then, remove his trousers, paint his buttocks bright orange and epoxy a plastic daffodil between his butt-cheeks.'

Then spray him with some Paco Industries "Eau de babouin en chaleur" and drop him at the baboon enclosure at NY Central Park Zoo.

Mike_W

JeffS said...

Skip the barge, and heave him into the water.

But leave the flower, and Mistuh Shulan can be a water borne memorial to Occupy Wall Street.

rinardman said...

“I really believe that the way America will look best, the way we can really do best, is to not be Americans so vigilantly and so vehemently,” Shulan said.

OK, I'm going to be an Albanian for three days a week...just to tone down my vigilant & vehement Americanism.

Michael Lonie said...

R-man,
Does that mean you're going to look for Serbs to beat up three days a week?

TOTWTYTR said...

Just remember that they are so much smarter than we are. We just aren't smart enough to understand what reallyhappened.

Anonymous said...

Deborah ....That very same "kitschy", "rah-rah America" image graces my checks. Hopefully, those who see it will remember clearly what obviously, Mikey has forgotten. Sack the preening twit, and offer him a one way passage to whichever Lefty Utopia of his choice. I'll pitch in for the bouquet complete with tracking chip. Plastic works best.

Anonymous said...

Deborah .... Maybe Richard's (McEnroe) brother and some of his friends could explain it to Sippy. He is a former firefighter that rescued people from one of the World Trade Towers on September 11th. He retired because of injuries that day.

Mikael said...

What does he mean by "rah-rah America"? I get the feeling of a chant at a world championship of some kind. Or am I completely in over my head here?
My question is meant quite seriously BTW.

Paco said...

Mikael: "Rah-rah" is part of an old football cheer. The term is sometimes now used in a derogatory sense to connote excessive enthusiasm (in this case, Shulan is arguing that the image represents excessive patriotism, verging on nationalism).

rinardman said...

...and offer him a one way passage to whichever Lefty Utopia of his choice.

He's already in New York City.

RebeccaH said...

I experienced my usual rush of rah-rah Americanism when I first read about this. In fact, I had to get up, walk around, mutter to myself, and go for a glass of iced tea to calm myself down. In short, I despise lefty pansy-assed jackwipes and their smug, supposed superiority.

SgtBob said...

The simplicity of the picture would distort the complexity of what happened. Hey, we Americans are pretty much a simple people. We don’t like complexity. We used to see right vs. wrong. People like Shulan operate in an in-between area where there are no finalities. People like Shulan want to control other’s thoughts and perceptions

Steve Skubinna said...

Guy does have a point. If we had been somewhat less... American, the jihadis might not have attacked us.

Five bucks says Shulan went to Europe after college with a Canadian flag on his backpack.

Paco said...

I'm certainly not covering that bet!

Mikael said...

Paco: Thank you.