In a stunning follow-up to the purchase of the Washington Post by Amazon's Jeff Bezos, the Kellogg Company has bought the New York Times and will move the newspaper's headquarters to Battle Creek, Michigan. Jim Jenness, chairman of the breakfast foods giant, revealed the takeover at a press conference today.
"We're excited to bring the Gray Lady into the Kellogg's family", Jenness said. "And it's only appropriate that we give her a new name. So, please, everybody welcome the new paper of record, Liberal-Frosted Journo-Bits!"
Oh, it's coming. You know it's coming.