That's right: I went to an IKEA store yesterday. First time in the place, Mrs. Paco and I wanted to get #1 Son a little dining table (eating arrangements have generally featured some combination of the coffee table and our laps). The place was massive, with acres of parking lot and a parking deck, to boot. We arrived just as the store was opening, and I saw plenty of spaces near the entrance - but it turned out those weren't for the likes of us. Signs read, "Disabled only", "Veterans", "Families of veterans", "Employee of the Month", and the cryptic "Manager of Tertiary Parking" (not sure what that was, or why it needed its own manager).
So, we wound up parking a little farther away than I had anticipated. And once inside, we saw how devilishly cunning these Swedes really are. It took us awhile to find the dining furniture, having blundered first into "Returns" and one of the store's two cafes. Once we tracked down our quarry, it became clear that closing the deal was not going to be that simple. We had to go find the downstairs warehouse where they keep the boxed furniture, locate the item and load it on to a cart. I made the mistake of following the exit signs in an attempt to leave the dining-table section and find the warehouse area. As it turns out, these signs very cleverly forced me to walk through practically every section of the huge second-floor showroom; no doubt it's set up that way to encourage people to buy more stuff than they originally had planned on purchasing.
The whole thing was only marginally easier than escaping from Alcatraz. Still, the table and chairs were very economically priced,
10 comments:
Sounds like CostCo -- if you go in that store for one item, you come out with a full shopping cart.
And they have LARGE shopping carts.
Others describe very similar experience of being trapped in IKEA. Those who survived and escaped anyway.
True. It's also why they have food demonstrators placed strategically in the store. Gotta keep the shopper's strength up.
Paco, it's why they have two cafes. Do they have free WiFi? You could have relocated and saved money...Well, initially. You would have used the savings to buying the Swedish meatballs they offer. Think of the stories that might present.
Too bad Number 1 son doesn't have a Temporary Disability plaque. It might be something to look into. By-the-way, how is he doing?
Could Daisy be a service dog?
Paco, are ya going to the rally in Richmond?
No, I'm too busy babysitting my grown children right now. #2 son recently busted his knee, too; don't think he's going to require surgery, but we're not sure yet. #1 is coming along fine.
Paco, your scary story brought to mind my being trapped, apparently forever, in a major, multi-level, interchange railway station in central Tokyo.
When I got off the train at my destination, I just followed the mob that disembarked with me, wrongly assuming that they would lead me to the exit to the street. Wrong. They led me to another platform where they waited to board their next train going who knows where. This process was repeated 4 or 5 times before I found an exit to the street.
After escaping, I quickly memorized the Japanese characters for "way in" and "way out". The Chinese use the same characters so they were very useful during my traveling days. Apart from American, the only other foreign language I needed to sustain life was "Dos cervazas por favor".
I can only speak from experience of the IKEA in Perth's inner suburbs, but layout-wise it sounds the same.
You don't get to go there for just one thing. I thought I was there for the simple purchase of cork mats. By the time I stumbled out into the daylight the simple purchase was more like a major expedition.
It's like meeting a girl who takes you home on the first date. You meet her parents. And her brothers and sisters. And their children. And the grandparents. And cousins of every conceivable degree.
There's no way out except straight ahead.
Did you run into Greta Thunberg?
OSM: No, I don't think her yacht has pulled in yet.
Skeeter: That's hilarious! I had a similar experience on the Washington Metro at one of the multi-level hubs.
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