Herding Voters

David Plouffe: Say, Mr. Axelrod, I hear dat da census is goin’ to be moved from da Department a’ Commerce to da White House under Mr. Emmanuel. Da census, now, dat’s like some kinda t’ermometer, ain’t it?

David Axelrod: Why, no, Mr. Plouffe, youse are tinkin’ a’ centipedes. Da census is like when every so often we do a head count of all da people in da country, mainly so’s we can tell where we ought to draw da lines for da congressional districts.

David Pluffe: Well, now, dat’s a shrewd move, Mr Axelrod!

David Axelrod: Oh, indubiously, Mr. Plouffe. Ya heard a’ Joe Stalin, ain’t ya?

David Plouffe: Yeh. He’s a bookie in Joliet, right? Got pinched in a federal sting last month.

David Axelrod: No, no, Mr. Plouffe. Joe Stalin used to be da top dog in Russia. He said what counts is not how many votes dere is, but who counts ‘em. And dere a lot easier to count when ya got yer own people bunched up in da same districts bein' counted by yer own boys, see? Dat also gives ya whaddaya call “concentrated fire power”. Ya spread da opposition out amongst a whole lotta yer own mugs an’ dere votes don’t do much damage.

David Plouffe: So, dat way, de Republicans get marginated, right, jus’ like Bugs Moran’s old mob?

David Axelrod: Yeh, dat’s right.

David Plouffe: Dat Stalin; he had quite a head on his shoulders!

David Axelrod: Hey, youse ain’t seen nuttin’, yet!