Friday, May 1, 2009
“Hi, Joe Biden, here, with a family member, cousin Ernie.
A lot of you right-wing extremists – that’s right, I’m looking at you, Jake Tapper – have taken my remarks about avoiding swine flu out of context. It’s true that I said I’d advised family members to stay off of trains and buses and airplanes – but that’s because we Bidens are mouth-breathers. As a result of hereditary adenoidal problems, it’s difficult for us to breathe through our noses, so we don’t have the advantage of filtering air through our nostril hair.
Well, I’m glad to have cleared that up. Now, if you’ll excuse us, Ernie and I have to catch a cab to the ball game. It usually takes us quite a while to flag one down, for some reason, so we need to get going.”