President Obama was literally in my neighborhood on Monday, meeting with a small group of drooling schmoes under the auspices of Democratic Rep. Gerald Connolly (who, may it please God, will be ex-Rep. Gerald Connolly, private citizen, come November).
The meeting was at the home of a couple of people I don't know, and the theme was small business. I believe the theme might more appropriately have been the apparent shortage of psychiatric care in Fairfax County.
Nicole Armstrong and John Nicholas had spoken to President Obama many times in their heads before he sat with them Monday afternoon on their Fairfax County patio next to a pitcher of lemonade.Ok, I added that last part. But really. Can you imagine them admitting to such an absurd fancy? It's not just the imaginary conversations; I, myself, have a vague recollection of arguing with William McKinley over his tariff policy one New Year's eve, after imbibing a half-dozen or so whiskey sours. It's their choice of confidant: an arrogant narcissist who probably had to have a teleprompter set up nearby to remember their names. C'mon, John! Fess up, Nicole! Even in your imaginary conversations, I'll bet the guy was constantly looking at his watch and stifling a series of yawns.
For years, the couple said they'd held imaginary conversations with the president. Both of them read his books to better understand how he thinks. And now, here he was, inside the picket fence of their red brick home in Mantua, talking to them privately before addressing their backyard guests, a mix of politicians, owners of small businesses and burly men in white coats wielding extra-large butterfly nets.
I never thought I'd say a thing like this, but I'm glad I was at work that day.
I blush to admit that I have written a couple of letters to the Iwon giving him sage advice he is not likely to get from any of his cronies. He never takes it, however. No wonder the country is going in the wrong direction.
ReplyDeleteMost likely, David Axelrod is intercepting his mail.
ReplyDeleteSay, if I imagine having conversations in my head with Alyssa Milano, asking her to re-tweet Stacy McCain, do you think that......?
ReplyDeleteJeffS -- I'll give you five bucks to switch to Penelope Cruz and me...
ReplyDeletePaco -- Tragedy! The Ruger got sold out from under me! Despair not, though, I'm looking at a getting a Uberti single-action in 44. Mag on a Single Action Army frame. It should kick even worse! Whee!
Richard: Nice looking hog leg!
ReplyDeleteThat ought to kick like a mule in heat, Richard!
ReplyDeleteYou think your talk with McKinley was frustrating? Try having a conversation with Clinton at the same time Monica was in the Oval Office. I still have nightmares of that man's voice hitting high notes while he talked about the tax code. I-R-YESS!
ReplyDeleteI envision two scenarios:
ReplyDelete1)Although I may prove too nervous to pull this off, I fantasize that I would be able to enunciate 'Hope & Change' and/or 'We are the farts we've been waiting for' by anal sphincter controlled fartulence.
2) While using the technique we apply in caring for patients with advanced gangrene by wearing a surgical mask infused with a few drops of mouthwash to overcome the smell and carrying small plastic bags to collect digits or other body parts that fall off the once healthy culture and economy, I would accurately interpret to him the Obama Effect.
"He really understands the needs of small businesses," he said.
ReplyDeleteAAAAHAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
*snort* That's a real knee-slapper, that is! *giggle*
You weren't invited, Paco? Not surprising really, since the presence of sanity, and clarity of thought would have disrupted their afternoon salon. That, and your probably on a "list". Unfortunately, I'm on another list. The one that gets email from Rham. No one was more shocked than I last year. That's what one gets for those fantasy conversations. Could it be bedbugs?
ReplyDeleteBTW, bet Mrs. Paco makes better lemonade.
Deborah Leigh
Deborah
OT Paco, the funny part was after Richard picked up his gun last night. We went to dinner at Burger King on our way to the phone bank for a congressional candidate. It's a good thing that he is so even tempered (not to mention the lack of ammo) or the TV at the Burger King (yes, at the Burger King...hey, it's California) would have had a few well placed rounds in it. The channel was tuned to Larry King, who for some reason was interviewing Bill Mahr. Nuff to spoil one's dinner.
ReplyDeleteDeborah Leigh
Deborah: If he had shot the thing, I don't think there's a jury in the country that would have convicted him.
ReplyDeletePaco, I'da considered it but the firearm in question was my ole blackpower .44 Dragoon and that's a lot of scrubbing for a moment's satisfaction.
ReplyDeleteOh, and shooting tip: if you fire a black powder revolver on an indoor range, they remember you when you come back...
A black powder pistol? Sweet! I love shooting those things; lots of smoke and flame.
ReplyDeleteYeah... listen... about that Angeles National Forest...
ReplyDelete