Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Welcome to the Cankles and Tent Pants International Airport

“Little Rock renames airport to honor Bill and Hillary Clinton”.

I hear they’re going to put up a statue, too: a bronze group featuring Bill Clinton taking cover behind Monica Lewinsky, while Hillary prepares to pitch an ashtray. Class.

8 comments:

  1. Deborah Leigh said...The lounge will also be named after Monica. The smoking section after Hillary. Children aren't allowed in either. The TSA patch will be shped like an ashtray, and the wand like a cigar. Blue dresses get special consideration.

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  2. Vince Foster Intl?

    Do they still have feeder flights to Mena, and a DC shuttle to Ft. Marcy Park?

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  3. "Approaching runway six nine."
    *giggle*

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  4. C.w. McCall "Lewis & Clark"March 22, 2012 at 5:50 AM

    Now Arnold Jones and Marybeth Jensen on their first ride out to Vegas, got John Denver on her ipod
    feelin' fine.

    Marybeth's hands were sorta clammy
    Arnold worried 'bout his mammy
    So we ran our gloved hands up and down around his heiny.

    Hands up in the air boy bend and spread in front of all
    We gonna get your situation under control.
    Cause I'm Fairweather Lewis this here's Willard Clark, we're the Clinton Airport TSA patrol.

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  5. Next verse if you can stand it:

    Then we spied ol' Marvin Kline
    Well he must be 89
    Stumblin' in like Napolitano's
    bleakest nightmare.
    His pocket had a Bible
    And his pickup had a sticker
    made us hunker down and vest and get the guns out.

    "My granddaughter's coming in,"
    He quavered and we grinned
    And we elbowed to be first to reach the scanner.
    'Cause we remember when
    a year ago she was ten
    We're the Clinton Airport TSA patrol.

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  6. The flight controllers will have to avoid using phrases like "Make another pass", lest the stewardesses, er, ummmmm, ah, female flight attendants, get testy.

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  7. Pre-flight check may take on a new meaning

    "UAL 303 Heavy, you are now inside the outer markers."

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  8. Damn, that's worse than I remember.

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