"There are countless horrible things happening all over the world and horrible people prospering, but we must never allow them to disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to sabotage and annoy them whenever possible." -Auberon Waugh
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Mayor Bloomberg somehow failed to offer this as Exhibit A for his anti-obesity campaign
I'm amazed that Bloomberg isn't offering NYC residents vouchers for liposuction. He could make the entire city thin, and pump money into the pockets of his cronies.
I intend to be cremated, and while I admit to being the large economy size (although not anywhere near that poor woman's weight - 440 lbs), I don't intend to downsize just so I can be cremated without setting the crematorium on fire. At my age, if I could downsize to svelte, I'd have done it long ago. I prefer to think I'm like my great-aunt, who insisted that everyone call her Fat Mama, even though she was only mildly corpulent, and physically active enough to maintain a kitchen garden, a farm, and a cattle paddock.
Frankly, I miss Fat Mama. She was a corker.
Whatever crematorium I go to will just have to adjust, damn their eyes, because, WTF, I'll be dead and I won't care.
I'm amazed that Bloomberg isn't offering NYC residents vouchers for liposuction. He could make the entire city thin, and pump money into the pockets of his cronies.
ReplyDeleteOn the taxpayer dime, of course.
I intend to be cremated, and while I admit to being the large economy size (although not anywhere near that poor woman's weight - 440 lbs), I don't intend to downsize just so I can be cremated without setting the crematorium on fire. At my age, if I could downsize to svelte, I'd have done it long ago. I prefer to think I'm like my great-aunt, who insisted that everyone call her Fat Mama, even though she was only mildly corpulent, and physically active enough to maintain a kitchen garden, a farm, and a cattle paddock.
ReplyDeleteFrankly, I miss Fat Mama. She was a corker.
Whatever crematorium I go to will just have to adjust, damn their eyes, because, WTF, I'll be dead and I won't care.