"There are countless horrible things happening all over the world and horrible people prospering, but we must never allow them to disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to sabotage and annoy them whenever possible." -Auberon Waugh
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Prepping for four more years of Obama
Here's my list of essentials:
Gold
Firearms and ammunition
Canned goods and MREs
Gas-powered generator
False beard and fake Canadian and Australian passports
You got any first aid supplies in that kit? How about water purification supplies? How about something to start a fire with in the event you run outta gas?
I would want an alternative method of heating the house (or hovel) were I in a real cold area. I'd want to be able to get water should the utilities no longer work. And I'd want to be able to cook the neighbors lil' yappy dogs should the need arise.
Swampwoman, we got plety of water in Canada. I think Paco's strategy is good. We need more right wingers here. I will suggest to Stephen Harper that we have an open border policy to US political refugees.
Deborah Leigh said...We had a nifty little can opener that we put on our dogtag chain. Very handy, just like the paracord that is woven into bracelets over at Operation Gratitude. Hope you won't mind a plug for OG. Every bracelet purchase helps send a package to a service member.
The fake beard won't look good on Mrs. P.
The trick to cooking gamey critters like small yappy dogs and some such is slow cooking.
Fake Australian Pasport? Naah we'll see about getting you a real one, with gum leaf pages held together with cockatoo droppings, and a wallaby pouch holder. Spat on for luck. Reel orthentique.
Plenty of old Blairites in this neck of the woods and there's a spare room at my place.
Have a spare .303 too. What you need is a yacht. Load it up with guns that are not quite legal here and we'll meet you in some quiet cove with all the documents you will ever need.
Hey, Paco, take the Jolly Codger to Miami. You can pick up anything you need to start a revolution there. The Blairites might fancy some grenade launchers.
You got any first aid supplies in that kit? How about water purification supplies? How about something to start a fire with in the event you run outta gas?
ReplyDeleteI would want an alternative method of heating the house (or hovel) were I in a real cold area. I'd want to be able to get water should the utilities no longer work. And I'd want to be able to cook the neighbors lil' yappy dogs should the need arise.
ReplyDeleteAn Obamaphone.
Haha, fake Canadian passport.
ReplyDeleteSwampwoman, we got plety of water in Canada. I think Paco's strategy is good. We need more right wingers here. I will suggest to Stephen Harper that we have an open border policy to US political refugees.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Robert. See what you can do.
ReplyDeleteAnd those are some good suggestions, Swampy.
When my family came over from the Old Country, half moved to the US, half to Canada - just in case something happened......
ReplyDeleteA light mortar can come in very handy. Go shopping at the local NGO armory...
ReplyDelete(Sigh)
ReplyDeleteSpell correct uber alles
NG
Freeze-dried food stores longer. Not as tasty as canned or MREs, but you can mix 'em together for a casserole.
ReplyDeleteSilver -- when gold is too much!
Oh, and some spices -- yappy dogs tend to be gamey.
Or so I'm told.
Alcohol. Whether you hoard store bought or make you own, you have to have alcohol-- for medicinal purposes, and to barter.
ReplyDeleteBear spray. For the drop bears.
ReplyDeleteDeborah Leigh said...We had a nifty little can opener that we put on our dogtag chain. Very handy, just like the paracord that is woven into bracelets over at Operation Gratitude. Hope you won't mind a plug for OG. Every bracelet purchase helps send a package to a service member.
ReplyDeleteThe fake beard won't look good on Mrs. P.
The trick to cooking gamey critters like small yappy dogs and some such is slow cooking.
Or so I've been told.
Fake Australian Pasport? Naah we'll see about getting you a real one, with gum leaf pages held together with cockatoo droppings, and a wallaby pouch holder. Spat on for luck. Reel orthentique.
ReplyDeleteAh, Bruce, that would be grand, indeed!
ReplyDeleteI recommend a good crossbow in case the ammo runs out. And a shovel.
ReplyDeleteWait, wait, wait! A shovel? Remember Fried Green Tomatoes? "The secret's in the sauce!"
ReplyDelete1. Swiss Army Knife
ReplyDelete2. Swedish FireSteel w/Vaseline cotton balls
3. Katadyn® MyBottle Microfilter
4. Esbit Mountain Stove
5. Maxpedition Versipack Jumbo EDC
6. Pemmican- http://www.dirtycarnivore.com/Docs/PEMMICAN.pdf
Cheers
Good stuff, Captain.
ReplyDeletePlenty of old Blairites in this neck of the woods and there's a spare room at my place.
ReplyDeleteHave a spare .303 too. What you need is a yacht. Load it up with guns that are not quite legal here and we'll meet you in some quiet cove with all the documents you will ever need.
Mk50 of Brisbane
Formerly MarkL of Canberra
Mark: Sounds good. I'm sure J.Packington Paco will lend me his yacht (the Jolly Codger).
ReplyDeleteHey, Paco, take the Jolly Codger to Miami. You can pick up anything you need to start a revolution there. The Blairites might fancy some grenade launchers.
ReplyDeleteConsider a Guatemalan passport too; then you can claim to be an undocumented immigrant when convenient.
ReplyDelete