Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Let’s protect the children…

…by completely eliminating their fun, cauterizing their imagination and turning them into paranoid poltroons, like the education bureaucrats who want to micro-manage their lives.

First off, Australia’s National Health and Medical Research Council has declared that there shall be no more birthday cakes in schools (blowing out candles can spread germs, you know).

Next, a second-grader in Denver was suspended for throwing an imaginary grenade at an empty box on the playground at the Mary Blair Elementary School. I don’t know who the principal is, but kindly accept my imaginary boot up your a$$ for your display of overbearing prissiness.

Mark my word, this policy of smothering concern will bear bitter fruit. At this rate, our military will one day consist exclusively of uniformed conflict resolution specialists armed only with comfort dogs and Deepak Chopra DVDs.


Anonymous said...

Deborah said... The police were called to an elementary school to arrest a kid for bringing a obviously, toy gun to school. "Obviously" because it has a red tip, and is plastic. The school powers are considering suspension.

In another case, a cihild tore a piece of paper into a "L" and held the short side. In other words, he made a gun. He might be suspended.

Soon they'll call SWAT.

At first I thought the Profs would be happy decreeing everyone wear bubblewrap suits, but now it seems that bullet proof armour.

bruce said...

Interesting that our National Health Medical Research Council should be imposing germ-free surrounds on kids exactly when RESEARCH is saying this sterility is the CAUSE of rising allergy/immune childhood sickness!

Jonah said...

Deborah: No, the Profs want the little children to learn how to recognize future leaders and inform
the authorities.

Yojimbo said...

"...comfort dogs and Deepak Chopra DVDs."

Yeah. "Navy, A Global Force For Good & Plenty."

"Rainbow 6 to Unicorn Base, that's enough pixie dust for today. Time to come home."

Yojimbo said...

Ooops! wrong spot!

JeffS said...

I recall a story written by a mother who kept a home that didn't look like a laboratory, marveling how children who lived in homes that were kept sterile by anal parents loved playing at her place, and didn't like going home. Imagine that.

The next generation is going to hate this generation, and I don't blame them.

rinardman said...

Is this anthropogenic evolution? Where's it going to end up? Will they reach a point where they think they have their system perfected, or will they just keep trying to bend human nature to fit their will?

I'm glad I won't be around to see the end result.