The Chicago-Washington axis

Plouffe: Mr. Axelrod, permit me to congratulate, salute and udderwise give yez da t’umbs up on yer new gig at NBC.

Axelrod: T’anks, Mr. Plouffe, but it ain’t really a new gig. I’m doin’ da same woik – boostin’ da Boss – but jus' more like a freelancer.

Plouffe: Ya mean like a independent contractor what gets hired to do sump’n for da same outfit dat he used to do on a reg'lar salary?

Axelrod: Yeh. Dat’s da ticket. When yez get right down to it, it’s all da same mob anyway. I’m blazin’ away at da same targets. It ain’t hardly no different dan jus' changin’ socks.

Plouffe: So, as a independent woikin’ fer dese allied fam’blies , youse are kinda like Moider, Incorporated, right?

Axelrod: Sure, sure. Dat’s a real good – whaddayacallit? – banalogy. Only it’s Left-wing, Incorporated.

Plouffe: Heh. “Left-wing, Incorporated”. Dat’s a hot one, Mr. Axelrod. But dere’s one t’ing: I tawt da nooz netwoiks was s’posed to be sorta unbiased. Not really, ya know, but kinda like a front operation. Youse’ll stick out, wontcha, since all dat time in da White House?

Axelrod: Are you kiddin’? Don’t be so nave, buddy. Da netwoiks gave up all dat fairness stuff a long time ago. Us lefties got to stick togeddah. I mean, it’s open warfare, now, just like Capone vs. Moran – and it wasn’t candy dat Big Al gave dose nort’side boys on Valentine’s Day, was it?

Plouffe: Heh. No, no it wasn’t. Anyhow, da right-wingers squawk too much, ya can always t’row ‘em a bone, put one a’ dere own guys on da program – like David Brooks or Joe Scarborough.

Axelrod: ‘zactly.

Plouffe: Well, it’s all jus' a big racket.

Axelrod: I know. Ain’t it grand?