Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Al Gore: the pitfalls of legacy building

You've seen them before. Hapless schnooks who seem constantly to be followed by bad luck (although, upon close examination, the "bad luck" almost always turns out to be driven largely by the slobs' own character flaws).

I suppose Al Gore can't be blamed for this, but somehow it just seems so...typical:
The Los Angeles-area Carson-Gore Academy of Environmental Sciences, named after Gore and pioneering environmentalist Rachel Carson , was built atop an environmentally contaminated piece of real estate, the Los Angeles Times reports. Some are now raising concerns that the $75.5 million school -- which sits across the street from an oil well -- may pose long-term health risks to its students, faculty and staff, as the groundwater beneath it is contaminated by chemicals.
I fear that someday we will be reading of a windmill tower in the Al Gore Memorial Wind-Turbine Field slicing up the last California condor, or Al Gore Geothermal Station #9 exploding and parboiling a herd of cows, or perhaps a family of itinerant fruit-pickers. Al has created a fair amount of bad luck for himself, but I believe it has now taken on a life of its own and is seeking him out, like Frankenstein's monster hunting its creator. Maybe pursued and pursuer will, like the characters in Mary Shelley's novel, eventually have a fateful encounter on an ice floe (a melting ice floe, no doubt, top-heavy with emaciated polar bears). The hilarity pathos will be overwhelming.


"And over here, we'll hang the lead aprons to be worn by the cafeteria staff".

H/T: Mrs. Paco

7 comments:

Steve Burri said...

"Everybody get down on the floor! You are my hostages until the Discovery Channel airs Gore-approved programming."

Paco said...

Bwahahaha!!

JeffS said...

Gore made a lot of his own luck, Paco, mostly in the form of "chickens coming home to roost".

I recall that his son was arrested for DUI the same night that Gore received his Nobel "prize". Not quite the same thing, but when people start screwing things up in a consistent manner, there's generally a root cause. Gore encourages sloppy thinking and behavior, so this is of no surprise.

But VERY amusing! Heh heh heh heh!!!!

RebeccaH said...

Not to be a wet blanket (which I generally am), but I don't believe Al Gore really cares. He made a mountain of money off his con, and so what if Tipper left him... there are beaucoup masseuses in the world. As for children, he no doubt expects them to follow in the Old Man's footsteps.

In the meantime, there are any number of educational groups, schools, and parents, who are still hellbent on raising illiterate, ignorant, propagandized children. The one upside I see, is that these children will be working for minimum wage for children like my grandchildren, who have been taught the realistic skills needed to succeed, and the life-affirming values to be able to recognize what is success and what isn't.

Merilyn said...

No offense but that photo looks more like a wax figure you would see in that famous Wax Museum in London. Note I didn't say what section.

Anonymous said...

ROFLMAO!!!! This is befitting of their "legacies". In a city that is broke no less. Now we have everything. I thought the Mao Cafe in Venice Beach, and the Che mural at a local school (Panorama City, I think) were the pinnacle. But this is the best!

Deborah Leigh

JorgXMcKie said...

He reminds of Joe Bftsplk in Lil Abner who had a cloud of bad luck over his head all the time. [His name was pronounced like a baseball raspberry, and that's how I usually refer to Gore.]