“I know what you’re thinking; you’d expect to pay $50,000, $100,000, up to $200,000 for a congressional district of this quality! But you’re wrong! We can let you have Rahm Emanuel’s congressional seat for only $19.95! How do we do it? We purchase congressional and senate seats wholesale so we can pass the savings on to you! Order today and we’ll double the number of congressional seats! You still pay only $19.95!”
(Not available in stores; credit card, check or money order only; no C.O.D., please; allow four to six weeks for delivery; shipping and handling charge of $35,000 per order; if not satisfied, will refund purchase price, less shipping and handling).
Wow! What a bargain!
ReplyDeletePerhaps I will buy two. It would be nice to have a couple that were accountable to me.
BUAWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
ReplyDeleteI immediately thought of you, Paco, when I saw this ad for a Chicago furniture store - have you been moonlighting as a copy writer?
ReplyDeleteI should have know Paco Enterprises were behind Billy Mays!
ReplyDeleteRetread
Well, Retread, it's a bit more complex than that. Yes, Billy Mays is underwritten by Paco, Ent. But the deal is, he pitches the competetors' products.
ReplyDeleteI'm certainly not the only sentient being to have swon a blood oath on my grandmother's grave to never purchase any product endorsed by Billy Mays.
Paco, you genius!
TW: bedioni. Somehow I think that's a North African analogue of a Zamboni.
We interrupt this broadcast for a totally off-topic & irrelevant bit of breaking news!
ReplyDeleteFrom the world of the NFL - Shanahan is out as coach at Denver!
Back to you, Paco, & thanks.
Steve: Heh. Great marketing strategy, eh?
ReplyDeleteSpotblog: Sure. We're in da furniture business; just like Al Capone.
ReplyDelete