Talking the Talk

Ninety Miles Away brings us up to speed on a few important changes in the language.

Whew! That's A Relief!

AIG is one of the companies whose problems ignited the global financial crisis, and it has been one of the largest beneficiaries of federal bailout money to date. But I guess if AIG can afford to pay out $450MM in bonuses, everything's now jake.

At Last!

Another blogger who's a shameless smoker. But as Monique points out, it's for the children - which makes for a great new ad campaign:

Things I Didn’t Know

Until now, that is.

1) The whoopee cushion was invented by Canadians.

2) Benjamin Franklin first thought up the idea of Daylight Savings Time.

3) There is a “non-standard” unit of measurement known as the smoot.

4) Japanese superstition: “If you lie down immediately after eating, you will become a cow” (which, if you’re already a cow, is not a big problem, I guess; otherwise, pretty traumatic).

Facebook? No, Thanks

I'm indifferent to the concept myself, but I admire Matt Labash's well-reasoned opposition and uncompromising hostility, and he's probably right in supposing that the provenance of this technological phenomenon is evidence of its perniciousness: "...no matter how long I live, no matter how much pressure is exerted, no matter how socially isolated I become, I will never, ever join Facebook, the omnipresent online social-networking site that like so many things that have menaced our country (the Unabomber, Love Story, David Gergen) came to us from Harvard..."

Sunday Funny

Funny, but true. Cuba has just guaranteed itself superpower status through its alliance with King George Tupov V of Tonga (well, actually, the "superpower" part isn't true; that's what you call your "sarcasm").

Sunday Funny Bonus: Guys, don't be that way (H/T: Are We Lumberjacks?).

Obama’s New Competence Czar Injured After Accidentally Walking Into Open Manhole While Checking E-Mail On His BlackBerry

Well, no, not really. But it’s exactly the kind of thing one would expect under the present regime. Pratfall after pratfall, gaffe piled on gaffe, economy-busting spending bills yoked with the new “Kick Me” foreign policy, nominees for high office disappearing like characters in an Agatha Christie novel. Color me unimpressed.

But taking into consideration the game plan of the liberals, do we really want competence at the top? When it comes right down to it, given the left-wing destination the Democrats have in mind for the ship of state, maybe a seasick captain hanging over the rails of the poop deck, oblivious to the increasingly panicked reports of his sailing master, is the lesser of two evils.

Postscript: On second thought, we don't want the ship of state going down with all hands, so I imagine that what we should be praying for is that B.O. will have some kind of epiphany and discover that everything he's believed his whole life long is nothing but the most egregious flapdoodle, and that he will do a 180 on his politics (and as Seinfeld used to say, "Good luck with all that").

Update: The incompetence theory is gaining traction.