Sunday funnies

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Plus, National Guard humor.

Oh, and Lance Burri has a good joke, too.

Birtherism is alive and well

It's just that, now, it is directed at yours truly. Steve Burri provides the details (as well as an airtight defense).

Happy Feet Friday (Saturday edition!)

Something a little different this time around: the Tractors update "Shortenin' Bread".

Just in case you’re wondering, yes, I have an alibi for that night

It’s certainly more creative than the usual ski mask: “Man in cow suit robs Wal-Mart of 26 gallons of milk”.

(H/T: Mrs. Paco)

The cost of government

It’s far worse than you think. The problem is not just what the government collects through taxes and borrowing, but the massive regulatory cost, as Wayne Crews and Ryan Young of the Competitive Enterprise Institute point out in this article:

The federal government is on track to spend more than $3.5 trillion this year. What most people don't know is that government actually costs about 50 percent more than what it spends. That's because complying with federal regulation costs an additional $1.75 trillion - nearly an eighth of GDP. And almost none of that cost appears on the budget.

A lawyer’s paradise, no doubt, but a nightmare for producers and consumers.

Laughs of the day

Rand Paul: “I want to see the original long-form certificate of Donald Trump’s Republican registration.”

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Dan Collins has announced a great contest:

So the dick-obsessed dickheads of San Francisco figured that instead of dealing with matters of importance they would dick around by making circumcision in San Francisco punishable by a $1000 fine or a year in jail or both.

In honor of the notoriety they have brought on themselves, I would like anyone who’s inclined to make up their No Circumcision Zone signs for the City to post at its borders, in case visitors plan on performing circumcisions (which should be safe, legal and rare, natch).

You creative types, get crackin'!

Is Michael Barone losing his touch?

I have long admired Michael Barone for his political savvy, his cool deliberation, his insightful analysis. So, you can imagine my disappointment when I read this article, in which he discussed the nomination process and did a quick run-through of the Republican presidential candidates, without ever mentioning me.

Well, let me give you a few hard facts facts, Mr. Barone, based on some sophisticated polling done by the respected firm, Polling Analysis and Cut-rate Oneiromancy:

1) I win handily in a face-off with Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot (and trail Juan Perón by less than two percentage points - and that’s probably just because of his fancy uniform).

2) In a preference check-off list of things people most want to avoid, a Paco presidency scored well below “being disemboweled with a spork”, and only one step ahead of “dying without benefit of clergy”.

3) At our recent family reunion, held at the home of Old Paco, I won 85% of the vote in a match-up with Gary Johnson (and, yes, I’m aware of charges that this poll may have been tainted by the purported likelihood that my relatives thought the Gary Johnson in question was the local bootlegger who sold the bad whiskey that laid out half the Paco clan at last year’s family reunion, instead of the former New Mexico governor, and that the 15% who voted against me were the Primitive Baptists in the family who think that imbibers of alcoholic beverages deserve whatever they get; however, I and my - or, heh, I mean the - polling firm deny these allegations).

In addition to polling strongly, I think I am assured of sufficient funding. I talked to my uncle, J. Packington Paco III, just last night, and he was delighted when I asked him for financial support. At least, he sounded delighted. He was laughing a lot, anyway.

It’s ok, Michael. Even the best hitters take their eye off the ball from time to time. Try to do better going forward. Tell you what; here’s something to keep you alert to the viability of a Paco presidential run: “White House spokesman Michael Barone”. Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?

Excuse me while I apply for a transfer to another federal agency

“It’s all right, ma’am, I’m a doctor TSA agent.”

Obama’s schizophrenic energy policy

The president is exhorting foreign oil producers to boost output, and the U.S. government has provided taxpayer-subsidized loans and guarantees to promote production in Brazil and Colombia. Yet, here at home, he is doing his level best to restrict drilling and exploration. Dan Kish at the Institute for Energy Research is baffled:

“The President now says his administration is pushing major oil producers to increase oil output in an effort to lower prices. What he really needs is to have someone tell the government of the world’s 3rd largest oil producer to boost output. In case he is unaware, that oil producer is the United States.”

“He could do that at his next cabinet meeting by telling EPA to stop holding up Shell’s drilling in Alaska and by telling Secretary Salazar to stop closing access to our nation’s energy supplies, which the Congressional Research Service says are larger than any country on earth.”

My guess is that the Complex-Thinker-in-Chief has gotten the results that he wanted – higher gas prices and a pretext for pushing commercially non-viable and hopelessly inadequate renewable energy alternatives – but is inexplicably stunned by the fact that the citizenry is up in arms about paying $80 or more for a tank of gasoline, and that this is translating into some very bad polling that could carry over to the 2012 election. Well, what did he think was going to happen? A boom in the bicycle market? A stampede to buy Chevy Volts? Or perhaps he figured we’d all be willing to slog off to the grocery store on foot, pushing wheel-barrows, glad for the chance to get some exercise, and grateful that our President has given the dunes sagebrush lizard a new lease on life.

There has been much discussion on the right about whether Obama is a committed socialist ideologue or just a clueless, prickly, not extraordinarily intelligent and rather lazy narcissist. I continue to maintain that there’s no reason he can’t be both.

(H/T: John at Powerline)

How right you are!

"Designer turns trash into high fashion" (the best example being this item).

So, how did Fed Chairman make out with his news conference today?

Well, judging by the spike in the prices of gas and gold, and the drop in the value of the dollar, not all that well.

Update: Obama and Bernanke to the rescue!

Well, there go the Lumbees

The Lumbee Indians aren't recognized as a sovereign tribe by the U.S. government, so they've never received the kind of comprehensive "assistance" that other tribes have gotten. Result? They're prospering.

Unfortunately, some of them have decided that they need a splash of that government gravy.

Born in the USA (and still the worst American president of modern times)

As Stacy points out, now, perhaps, we can stay focused on Obama’s sheer awfulness as chief exec.

Because weer stoopid and that’s wot we do.

The pen is mightier than the sword

And mightier than b.s., too.

Australia in the news

Our mates down under may have achieved a new record with the “Trinidad Scorpion Butch T” chili pepper.

A group of Australians is seeking world record status for a new variety of chilli, a bright red pepper so potent that processing it for eating requires gas masks and protective chemical warfare-like clothing.

The "Trinidad Scorpion Butch T" chilli, a mere 2.5 cm (1 inch) long, comes it at a fiery 1.46 million Scoville Heat Units (SHU) per chilli, according to testing by Melbourne firm EML Chemical == taking it well past the Naga Viper British Chilli, the current Guinness record-holder at 1.38 million SHU.

Also, it looks like kangaroos may get their day in court.

Don’t mess with Texas

Or with governor Rick Perry. An interesting profile by Kevin Williamson at NRO.

“Her-ro, Jimmy!”

Extremely ex-president Jimmy Carter is planning a trip to North Korea, where he will take a stab at, er, “assessing severe food shortages and discussing the possible revival of nuclear disarmament talks.”

Here’s some classic feel-good-don’t-blame-the-tyrant gobbledeygook from Mr. Peanut:

"In almost any case when there are sanctions against an entire people, the people suffer the most and the leaders suffer least," he said. "And we believe that the last 50 years of deprivation of the North Korean people to adequate access to trade and commerce has been very damaging to their economy, as well as some problems they may have brought on by themselves [emphasis added by nearly speechless me]."

I suppose it’s progress that Goober would even hint that, just maybe, a teensy bit of blame might attach to the communist system. The truly sad news, of course, is that Jimmy Carter is the export that keeps getting sent back. Surely some benighted foreign land has a long-term job for a skilled carpenter.

(H/T: Genghis at Ace of Spades)

Poor, dear, dumb Sarah Palin Ben Bernanke

Let the Fed buy up U.S. government debt, thereby creating artificially low interest rates and weakening the dollar. What could possibly go wrong?

Well, rather a lot, as Sarah Palin pointed out last year. Notwithstanding Obama’s absurd public hunt for “speculators”, it is Ben Bernanke’s quantitative easing policy that has contributed materially to domestic inflation in food and energy prices. Well played, Ben!

Gold and silver are way up, too, at least partly because investors are getting increasingly skittish about U.S. economic policy and the by-now-completely-obvious fiscal irresponsibility that our political leaders have been engaging in for decades (aided and abetted by we the people, who keep electing these witless wonders). My guess is that you won’t see gold drop below a thousand dollars an ounce unless Obama is tossed out of the White House in 2012 – maybe not even then, unless Congress gets serious about entitlements reform.

Hey, who says Obama doesn’t keep his promises?

Dan Collins has the evidence that, when it comes to energy, it’s “mission accomplished!”

What does David Brooks say when he talks in his sleep?

I imagine his somnolent mutterings sound very like his wakeful blather:

“[Obama is] multiple animals,” Brooks said. “You know, I would say we’re all – we all have multiple personalities. My psychobabble description of him is he’s a very complicated person who has many different selves, all of them authentic, but they come out in different contexts. And he is — has always has [sic] the ability to look at other parts of himself from a distance, and so it means he has great power to self-correct and I think it gives him power to see himself. It means that he rarely is all in.”

Brooks is starting to sound like a teenage boy who has fallen hard for a selfish, narcissistic girl whose interest in him is limited to getting the occasional lift to the mall because her car’s in the shop. He’s now reduced to making ridiculous excuses in defense of a president who is a cold, calculating ideologue, completely lacking in genuine charm, and so thoroughly arrogant that he is practically indifferent to his increasing reputation for mendacity and fecklessness.

Obama may, indeed, be “multiple animals”, but the only one which need concern us is the leopard that is not about to change its ideological spots.

Monday Movie

I have always considered the first ten minutes or so of the 1954 Sci-Fi classic Them! to be one of the best >opening sequences in the genre.

From the shelves of someone else’s library

Jonathan Barnes on Judith Flanders’ new book, The Invention of Murder. Looks to be rather spine-tingling.

Explain it to us, John

Many of us are confused by the war in Libya – although, apparently, John McCain’s supple brain has it all figured out.

Sunday funnies

Time for breakfast. Come and get it!

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I believe I may have linked this in the distant past, but it's always fun to have another look. Peter Rabbit, Tank Killer (H/T: Captain Heinrichs).

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Obama's future career was evident at an early age to astute observers (H/T: Gavin Atkins).

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"Reagan Days".

Christ is risen!

But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they went to the tomb, taking the spices they had prepared. And they found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they went in they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. While they were perplexed about this, behold, two men stood by them in dazzling apparel. And as they were frightened and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.” And they remembered his words, and returning from the tomb they told all these things to the eleven and to all the rest. Now it was Mary Magdalene and Joanna and Mary the mother of James and the other women with them who told these things to the apostles, but these words seemed to them an idle tale, and they did not believe them. But Peter rose and ran to the tomb; stooping and looking in, he saw the linen cloths by themselves; and he went home marveling at what had happened.

Update: Fishersville Mike not only has great taste in presidential candidates, but also in music: this is a fine version of my favorite Easter hymn.

Socialist’s progress

More indications that we’ve taken the turnoff onto the road to serfdom.

First, Obama’s National Labor Relations Board has ordered a private company, Boeing, to build its planned new factory in unionized Washington rather than in right-to-work South Carolina. Is Obama’s goal the sort of trade union hell that characterized pre-Thatcher Britain? (And, yes, that’s a rhetorical question).

Secondly, Obama thinks that the typical rich guy is Scrooge McDuck, a cartoon capitalist who enjoys nothing so much as withdrawing to his private vault to wallow in his idle cash. Well, pardon me, Mr. Billion Dollar Candidate, but your hypocrisy’s showing. This is economic illiteracy on stilts, and I don’t want to ever hear again how “smart” and “intellectual” and “cerebral” this spindly, jug-headed dumbass is.

Finally, Obama’s now copping an O.J. Simpson attitude on gas prices. Just as O.J. claimed, after his trial, that he was going to dedicate the rest of his life to finding his wife’s real killer (a simple hand mirror would have sufficed), Obama, who has killed new offshore drilling (except in Brazil, of course), has instructed the Department of Justice to get to the bottom of these gasoline price hikes. Another chance to deflect attention from his own culpability, and demagogue the oil company executives.

And this guy’s approval level is still hovering in the mid-40s? Dang! Is Pogo right?


Typical wealthy American.

The Hubble telescope celebrates its 21st anniversary

Here's a slide show featuring some fascinating photos.

Life, liberty and the pursuit of horsepower

I'm probably the last person in the United States to see this commercial, but I just stumbled across it on You Tube.

The theme's a little ironic, given the fact that Chrysler has been bailed out not once, but twice, by the government. Still, pretty funny.

Happy Feet Friday

Louis Jordan says that chick’s too young to fry.

The Power of Stupid

John at Powerline has a video clip featuring some of the bloviating young naïfs of an environmental organization called Powershift 2011. It’s 2 minutes and 58 seconds of high-falutin’ piffle, seasoned with organic ignorance and free-range cheek. Special guest appearances by Nancy Pelosi and Van Jones remind us that the imbecilariat does not discriminate on the basis of age, race, sex or employment status (Jones’ comments will be of particular interest to ideological pathologists. It’s not just for the children; it’s for the children of all species. Somewhere, a mother nuthatch flapped her wings in glee, mama and papa prairie dog barked their hearty approval, and a pod of sperm whales exhaled with thunderous excitement in a fanfare of blowholes).

This, too, is modern America. I do not wonder that an ounce of gold has pierced the $1,500 barrier, or that people are increasingly looking to buy homes overseas or that gun sales have gone through the roof over the last two years. If the…“thinking”… underlying the worldview of these idiots becomes the law of the land, I can foresee a time when the only freemen will be outlaws. At which point I will gladly embrace my inner Jesse James.

Assortment

Obama continues his war of intimidation against private citizens.

Is there a formula for driving down the price of gas? There sure is: “It involves either persuading Obama to reverse his opposition to significant expansion of domestic energy production, or replacing him in the Oval Office in November 2012.” Actually, I believe that should be an “and”, not an “either/or”, formulation.

Dan Collins has more on the price of gasoline.

Prosser isn’t out of the woods yet. Richard McEnroe says it ain’t over until all the votes have been counted – including these.

Mark Steyn issues another brilliantly-worded wake-up call:

Incremental decline is easy to get used to…That’s the trick with decline: persuading people to accept it. The Transportation Security Administration, which in a decade of existence has never caught a single terrorist, has managed to persuade freeborn citizens to accept that minor state bureaucrats have the right to fondle your scrotum without probable cause. The TSA is now unionizing, which means that this hideous embodiment of bureaucratized sclerosis will now have its fingers in your gusset until the end of time.

Hey, you know what this country needs? Guillotines (H/T: Babalú).

Eggs and omelets, my friends, eggs and omelets.

Mind Numbed Robot’s got your Obama jokes right here.

Wedding bells

Friend, commenter and fellow blogger, bingbing, is getting married! Best wishes to the happy couple.

Just a few more billion ought do the trick

T. Boone Pickens and Ted Turner think you should pony up, Mr. and Mrs. Taxpayer.


“Brother, can you spare some loose billions?”

So, what was Che doing during the Bay of Pigs invasion?

He was pretty much pinned down by a few rowboats filled with firecrackers.

Humberto Fontova reveals the inglorious details (as is usually the case, the facts of Che’s life turn out to be at least as farcical – if not more so - as my fictional yarns about the man).

H/T: Babalú

Dummies for dummies

Ed Driscoll makes an amazing discovery about Dennis Kucinich (bonus points awarded for correctly identifying which one in the video is Kucinich).

Royal Wedding

The Lego version (slide show here).

The only things missing are some little Lego yobs and militant Muslims hanging out on the fringes.

You’re kidding, right?

Donald Trump? Donald Trump? A presidential candidate?

Please. The guy’s just trying to add something cool to his resume. George Will, Charles Krauthammer and Mark Levin have him dead to rights. Besides, do we really want a president who looks like Larry Talbot under a full moon?




See what I mean?

If the people insist on going with a total outsider, they should at least stick with one whose conservative bona fides are impeccable (and who is lycanthropy-free).

Sometimes government bureaucrats come up with good ideas

This isn't one of them. Unless, of course, you think distributing superhero capes to the unemployed makes sense.

Really, does anyone – aside from a state government drone – think that running around in the guise of Captain Jobless is going to build self-esteem?

Talk about your dirty jobs

Freelance minister and theologian of the ‘hood, Jesse Jackson, is being sued by a former employee who claims he was harassed because he’s gay.

In a formal complaint Bennett claims he had to escort women to Jackson`s room and clean up his room after sexual intercourse with women.

He claims he had to do it because of his sexual orientation.

”Clean up his room after sexual intercourse”. Man, that’s got to be a disgusting assignment. I wonder why Jackson didn’t just farm that job out to, say…


“Na-aa. Don’t even think about it.”

President pegged

Lifted from The People's Cube, via Are We Lumberjacks?

Hey, Obama is creating green jobs…

…er, overseas.

Take the Meadow Lake Wind Farm in Indiana, which received the single largest 1603 grant, $276 million. Meadow Lake is owned and operated by Horizon Wind Energy, a wholly owned subsidiary of EDP Renovaveis, a Portuguese company. Choma reported that the turbines at Meadow Lake are manufactured by Vestas, and thus "likely made in Denmark, where Vestas is from." The turbines sit atop 350-foot towers imported from Vietnam.

So U.S. taxpayers cut a $276 million check to a Portuguese company in order to create jobs in Denmark and Vietnam.

And all of the birds that get chopped up by the wind turbines can be processed into a protein paste that we can eat in lieu of beef from environmentally-unfriendly flatulent cows. It’s a win-win situation!

While we're on the subject of things green, I note that Al Gore seems to have signed up another foot soldier for his Warmengruppen - and this guy's no slouch when it comes to the whole cult thing:

Crazed cult leader Charles Manson has broken a 20-year silence in a prison interview coinciding with the 40th anniversary of his conviction for the gruesome Sharon Tate murders – to speak out about global warming.

Melter Skelter!

Krugman Klobbered

Stacy McCain and Professor William Jacobson give leftist broken record Paul Krugman a tag team ass whuppin’.

Bottom line? When liberals talk about civility, they mean conservatives should just shut up. Thank God for the “incivility” of scrappers like Sarah Palin.

Canadian combat coffee

Mmm f***ing good, eh?

(Very strong language warning).

H/T: Gavin Atkins

Monday movies

Errol Flynn and Basil Rathbone go at it in one of Hollywood’s greatest sword-fighting scenes (from the 1938 movie, Robin Hood). Interestingly, Basil Rathbone was, in fact, an accomplished swordsman, whereas Flynn was a simple hacker and slasher. After one-too-many near misses, Rathbone reportedly told the director that if Flynn didn’t acquire some technique, he was going to run him through.

Bonus video! Basil Rathbone takes on Tyrone Power in The Mark of Zorro (the audio is a little out of kilter; either that, or the actors had been inhaling helium before the scene was filmed).

Also: Robert Avrech at Seraphic Secret has an interesting recommendation.

Heh

Michael Barone reflects on "President Whatever".

A funny line, but a serious article:

The fact is that HHS Secretary Kathleen Sebelius has granted more than 1,000 waivers from Obamacare. Many have been granted to labor unions. Some have been granted to giant corporations like McDonald's. One was granted to the entire state of Maine.

By what criteria is this relief being granted? That's unclear, and the GAO audit should produce some answers. But what it looks like to an outsider is that waivers are being granted to constituencies that have coughed up money (or in the case of Maine, four electoral votes) to the Democrats.

If so, what we're looking at is another example of gangster government in this administration. The law in its majesty applies to everyone except those who get special favors.

The Obama administration: the biggest protection racket in history.

Sunday funnies

Do you still doubt that Obama is fighting strawmen? Steve Burri has the photographic evidence.

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The legacy media may be cooperating in the apotheosis of Obama, but Jill Biden's on her own.

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Employment advice from wild man TimT.

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Bob Belvedere kicks in with the Paco campaign song.

VOTE EARLY AND OFTEN FOR PACO

A new star is rising in Blogdom
A Son of Liberty they say
His voice has the swell of a Paul Revere bell
And he’s making political hay


If you get a chance to support him
He’ll never forget and you’ll find
You’ll never go broke, if you vote for that bloke
Here’s something to fix in your mind…


Vote early and often for Paco
He’s bound to go places they say
He’s going to be Prez and the chances are fair
That he’ll be in The White House some day
He’s going to lower taxes all over
There never was no one like him
He charms all the voters like bird in the trees
He sounds like a guy with an Oxford degree
It’s fifty to one that our next Prez will be
The man in the pinstripe, so mark you ballots for him

St. Patrick in faraway Ireland
He drove out the snakes in a rout
And Paco they say, in the very same way
Will kick the Social Democrats out


The days of the Bolshes are numbered
They’re standing aghast in Georgetown
They’re all in retreat, up and down DC’s streets
With Paco, the whip will come down, so…


Vote early and often for Paco
Just wait ‘till you hear him campaign
He turns on the charm and the boys on the farm
Can hear him up Wisconsin way
He wears a fedora and shoots magnums
There never was no one like him
This Paco’s a winner whatever he tries
The sound of his voice brings tears to your eyes
They say he’s a cinch for the next Nobel Prize
It’s easy to see that our next Prez will be
The man in the pinstripe, so mark you ballots for him

Will Obama start claiming that the Israelis are zapping him with secret Jew rays?

Smitty comments on Obama's increasingly "Mel Zelaya-esque" behavior.

Happy Feet Friday (Saturday edition!)

Sister Rosetta Tharpe swings “That Lonesome Road”, with Lucky Millinder and his band.

Assortment

Bad news for Wronwright: “China bans time travel”.

Apparently telling Gaddafi to go is about as effective as telling a beagle, “come here!”

Not sure how I missed this, but thanks to Greg for reminding me: a belated happy birthday to Gina Elise.

36 Chambers explains why, in the old days, you’d ask the operator for Pennsylvania 6-5000.

Troglopundit has the delicious irony of the day.

Smitty contemplates the Trump phenomenon.

As a Virginian, I take a dim view of the possibility of a “Senator” Tim Kaine. So does SWAC Girl.

Does Little Miss Attila pose a threat to the environment? (Sorry, what was the question again?)

Obama hears mysterious footsteps.

It was just another day down on Swampy’s farm. Also, happy anniversary to Swampy and her man!

So, that’s where my bags went.

On so many levels, Keith Olbermann is a perfect demonstration of the necessity of the work the Tourette Syndrome Association does.

Obama’s goal is to raise one billion dollars for his campaign fund.

Barry shares his disappointments

The president of the United States has spoken:

”The Oval Office, I always thought I was going to have really cool phones and stuff," he said during a small fundraising event at a Chicago restaurant. "I'm like, c'mon guys, I'm the president of the United States. Where's the fancy buttons and stuff and the big screen comes up? It doesn't happen."

Paco Enterprises has heard your plea, Mr. President. We will be sending you something commensurate with the dignity that you have brought to the office.


You're welcome.

Peeps!

Check out the winner of the Washington Post's peeps diorama contest.

I knew it was going to come to this

There are times in history, and in the myths that mirror history on a larger-than-life scale, when great men, finding themselves on opposite sides of some epic struggle, come together in an inevitable clash of titans: Hector and Achilles; Wellington and Napoleon; Lee and Grant; Patton and Rommel; Kevin Jasper and Larry Jackson. You get the picture.

It was only a matter of time before bike-path skeptic Tim Blair and pedaling enthusiast Boy on a Bike would face each other in the dusty street of some lawless town and slap leather…

Or something like that.

The Obama/Paco debates (continued)

The president and the first lady are dining in a luxuriously-appointed, very exclusive Chinese restaurant

Obama [pushing his chair back and undoing the buttons on his suit jacket]: Ahhhhh! That was excellent!

Michelle[reaching over to pat his hand]: I’m so glad you liked it, Barack! And it was good to get away from the White House for a relaxing, intimate dinner. You know, just the six of us: you, me, and the four Secret service guys.

Obama: You said it! I needed a break. That Paco guy is driving me crazy. He keeps popping up out of nowhere, trying to carry on a debate. I don’t have to talk to Republicans at all, particularly unknown ones.

Michelle: Calm down, baby. You’re absolutely right. Yes?

Waiter: I crave your pardon for intruding, madam, but our esteemed proprietor especially wanted you to try our fortune cookies.

Michelle: Oh, that‘ll be fun! Here, honey, take one.

Obama: Ok. [Opens up fortune cookie and unrolls the long, thin paper contained therein. His smile is suddenly replaced by a look of horror]

Michelle: Barack! What’s the matter? You look ashen.

Obama: Listen to this! “What’s more important, Mr. President: insulting Paul Ryan or getting serious about the budget?” Open yours up. What does it say?

Michelle: It says, “All we need is for your husband to get attacked by a killer rabbit and the analogy is complete.”

Obama: Waiter! Where did you get these fortune cookies?

Waiter: Oh, we buy only from the best Asian food supply house in the eastern United States, Mr. President: the Pleasant Abode of Culinary Opulence.

Obama: Hmmm. Well, there’s something decidedly fishy going on, though I can’t quite put my finger on it. Come on, Michelle. Let’s get out of here.

Waiter [bowing]: Good evening, Mr. President, Mrs. Obama. There will always be a table waiting for you here at Pok-Ho’s Restaurant!

Obama[stomping out, with Michelle and his squad of Secret Service agents]: Michelle, how did you hear about this place?

Michelle: Why, Gus suggested it. You know what a gourmand he is. He knows all the best places to eat.

Obama: Gus? My manservant? How can he afford to dine out in expensive restaurants? I’ll have to have a chat with him.

Michelle: Well, it’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Don’t you remember? He has the night off.

A half hour later, a tall, distinguished man of African descent walks into Pok-Ho’s Restaurant. He is dressed impeccably in a gray, pinstriped suit, double-breasted black cashmere overcoat and dove-gray Homburg hat. A smiling hostess takes his hat, gloves and walking stick, and he is instantly recognized by the maître d’.

Maître d’: Ah, it is a pleasure to see you again, Mr. D’Orleans! Your usual table?

Gus: But of course, Monsieur Chang! And you will not be forgetting ze fortune cookies?

Maître d’: The very special ones containing the crisp new… prognostications… straight from the U.S. mint? No, sir, I will not forget. Our gracious proprietor made his wishes known with complete clarity on that point.

One day after the anniversary of the beginning of the American Civil War, Obama decides to start a new one

Here are some things we learned from the President’s remarkable speech:

1) Obama is either (a) an economic illiterate whose lack of comprehension and genuine ideas has caused him to fall back on the stale Democratic tactic of flogging the class warfare theme, or (b) he is a conscious agent of the Cloward-Piven strategy, seeking to hasten the transformation of the U.S. economy into a statist model through a series of purposeful crises intended to make the vast majority of the American people dependent on the federal government. For the record, his motives don’t matter. The results will be the same.

2) He has burned his bridges with respect to any chance he may have had to conduct himself as a unifier, as a serious-minded chief executive working honestly to create a rational, effective compromise. He is the quintessential self-promoter who has never left the campaign trail, a born demagogue whose self-esteem is wrapped up in a zero-sum concept of political success: for me to win, you must lose.

3) Obama will not be led to make the right decisions through logical, civil argument. His hand will need to be forced every time, on every substantive issue, through sustained political pressure.

4) In temperament he is mean-spirited, in discourse dishonest, in tone arrogant, in intelligence deficient and in vision hallucinatory. He would have fit right in among the Roman emperors of the first century A.D. As the president of a country founded on a belief in liberty and self-reliance, and as nominal leader of the free world, he is manifestly unfit.

The best way to derail Obama’s express train to socialism is to defeat him in 2012. The next best plan is to deprive him of the support of his legislative Mamluks by turning the Democratic Party into a minority in both houses of Congress. Note: this does not mean replacing Democrats with big-government Republicans.

Have you no shame, sir?

In what is sure to go down in history as one of the most preposterous, inflammatory speeches of all time, President Obama (Gad, I'll be happy when I can stop writing that!) essentially charged Rep. Paul Ryan and his Republican colleagues with being berserkers drooling over the prospect of tossing infants back and forth on the tips of their spears. The speech at least served to prompt this wonderful line from Ryan: "[Obama's] basically a pyromaniac in a field of strawmen."

Climate change!

Gore must be right because…Vaclav Klaus stole a pen!

(H/T: Mrs. Paco)

A wry look at the “science” of management

It’s gratifying to see something you’ve always suspected validated in print by a thoughtful observer who has given the matter much thought. Matthew Stewart looks at the “Management Myth” - herewith a sample:

The recognition that management theory is a sadly neglected subdiscipline of philosophy began with an experience of déjà vu. As I plowed through my shelfload of bad management books, I beheld a discipline that consists mainly of unverifiable propositions and cryptic anecdotes, is rarely if ever held accountable, and produces an inordinate number of catastrophically bad writers. It was all too familiar. There are, however, at least two crucial differences between philosophers and their wayward cousins. The first and most important is that philosophers are much better at knowing what they don’t know. The second is money. In a sense, management theory is what happens to philosophers when you pay them too much.

A gem of an essay (H/T: Captain Heinrichs).

Assortment (Special Federal Budget Edition)

Did Boehner score a big victory, or did he get hornswoggled? Conservative pundits are all over the map on this one.

Jeffrey Lord at the American Spectator looks at the GOP and sees a battle shaping up between Charlie Sheen Republicans and Inchon Republicans.

Rush Limbaugh suspects that the media doth protest too much.

Jimmy Bise thinks we got about the best deal we could hope for, in the short term.

Carl Cameron thinks Boehner won in a walk, while Stacy McCain is extremely skeptical.

Jeff G., to put it mildly, views the Republican victory lap as extraordinarily premature.

I number myself among the skeptics. Boehner probably did all he thought he could do, but as an establishment Republican, what he thinks is possible may well be far short of what was actually possible (not to mention positively necessary). And the overriding fear that certain Republicans, including Boehner, seem to have about the prospects of a temporary government shutdown, and the ramifications for the standing of the GOP in the polls, automatically boxes them in at the negotiating table. I don’t question Boehner’s integrity, or the sincerity of his commitment to reducing the size of government; however, I am withholding judgment on his fitness to lead a fiscal (which entails a philosophical) revolution. He is allowing himself to be nudged forward by the Tea Party, but I don’t see him champing at the bit to lead the charge.

Success in paring back the role and expense of government will require courage and imagination and continuous engagement with the American people – as well as the realization of the fact that our differences with the Democratic leadership and their many allies in the media, the unions and other activist political organizations are no longer just a matter of degree: they represent profoundly antithetical visions of what America is and what it should be.

The most recent political skirmish was about numbers – and not very significant numbers, at that. But the problem is not just about dollars and cents. If Boehner doesn’t wake up to the fact that the fight for fiscal sanity is only part of a much larger struggle over the proper relationship between government and citizen, he is likely to wind up being our Joe Johnston: an updated version of the Confederate general best known for fighting well-planned, brilliantly-managed retreats.

Update!!!! - I guess if I had waited, I could have saved myself the trouble of typing this post. Looks like the question with which I opened it has been answered. We are well and truly Boehnered!

Update II - It all reminds me of an old joke:

Sam: You're the biggest coward I ever saw!
Bill: You say that again and I'll bust your jaw!
Sam: Consider it said again.
Bill: Consider your jaw busted.

Update III - Paco in 2012. Not just a choice; a fashion statement.


(Thanks to Col. Milquetoast. Your check is, er, in the mail)

The Obama/Paco debates (continued)

The Oval Office. President Barack Obama, the weight of the world on his shoulders, is trying to relieve stress by putting golf balls into his 1987 “Excellence in Community Organizing Award” coffee mug. He has lined up a 10-foot shot…he eases the head of his putter back a few inches…and, just as he brings the club forward…he chips the ball, thrown off his stroke by a loud, disembodied voice…

Voice: Mr. President, why did it take two years and the prospect of a government shutdown to finally draw your attention to our budget crisis?

Obama: Damn! Where is that noise coming from? Gus!

The president’s gentleman’s personal gentleman – Gustave Napoleon Toussaint D’Orleans, former valet to President Not-Quite-For-Life Baby Doc Duvalier of Haiti - is standing in the background, wearing a checked green and white Big Apple cap, tweed plus-fours, two-toned white and brown golf shoes (sans cleats), and carrying a bag of clubs over one shoulder, in order to lend an air of verisimilitude to the president’s putting exercise.

Gus: Oui, Monsieur le President?

Obama: Who is that out there doing all of that shouting?

Gus: I believe it eez Monsieur Paco, one of ze Republican presidential candidates. When I was taking ze air a half hour ago, I noticed dat he was walking back an’ fort’ along Pennsylvania Avenue, wearing – how do you say? – a sandwich board proclaiming heez platform. An’ he eez complementing heez written manifesto wit’ ze spoken word, ably assisted in dat regard wit’ what eez referred to as a “bullhorn”.

Paco: Are you afraid to debate the issues, Mr. President?

Obama [smacking his forehead in sudden recollection]: Ah, yes, now I remember. I had a telephone debate with him last week. I had to cut it off early because…er...

Gus: You were seven over par?

Obama: Because of urgent budget negotiations! Can’t we get rid of that guy?

Gus: I do not presume to be a constitutional expert on a level wit’ Monsieur le President, but I am t’inking dat Monsieur Paco eez seemply exercising heez first amendment rights, n’est-ce pas?

Obama: So, I don’t suppose…you know…the sniper on the roof…?

Gus: I radder t’ink not, Monsieur le President.

Paco: A few weeks ago, you proposed the biggest budget, not only in the history of our country, but in the history of any country or empire in the world. Now you’re preparing a speech that will emphasize the importance of living within our means. Does that include the government, Mr. President, or just those people who aren’t yet driving Chevy Volts?

Obama: Grrrr! What a confounded nuisance that fellow is. It’s a good thing he’s probably just viewed by passersby as some kind of nut.

Gus: But, au contraire, sir! He was gaddering quite a crowd a while ago, and dey seemed bien disposé to heez declarations, wit’ much of ze sympathique nodding of ze heads. Mmm, oui…eet was ver’ like ze excited pipples in Port au Prince in ze last days…

Obama: All right, all right! Maybe I should go out and talk to this Paco guy, show him up for the fringe player that he is. Let’s go.

The president snags a couple of Secret Service men and walks out of the White House; however, far from finding a small crowd of zany malcontents, he sees hundreds of protesters, standing beneath a sea of Gadsden flags, chanting a strange slogan.

Obama: Whoa! I wasn’t expecting this. What is that they’re saying, Gus?

Gus: Eet sounds like, “Paquismo, sí! Obama, no!”

Obama [sighing right down to the soles of his feet]: Gus, go pack my bags. I am suddenly overwhelmed by a need to retire to Camp David for some private meditation.

Doing an about-face and scurrying back to the White House, Obama casts one last glance over his shoulder, catching a glimpse of his foe, who is almost completely obscured by a sandwich board, save for his head, which is topped with an elegant Panama hat and is sporting a pair of “state trooper” shades. The president scowls as his opponent lobs another verbal grenade his way.

Paco: Hey, Mr. President! Where you running off to? Are you planning on running away and hiding until November of 2012? Is that going to be your campaign theme? “President Gingerbread Man”?

“Run, run, as fast as you can.
You can't catch me!
I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

The chant is picked up by the crowd.

Obama: Gus, so help me God…

Gus: Ah, laughing wit’ you, Monsieur le President, not at you.

Suicidal government

Robert Samuelson lays out the cold, hard facts on the subject of out-of-control government spending, raising the uncomfortable, but vital, question: has a combination of greed, complacency and ignorance turned America into a suicidal society?

The consequence is political overload: The system can no longer make choices, especially unpleasant choices, for the good of the nation as a whole. Public opinion is hopelessly muddled. Polls by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago consistently show Americans want more spending for education (74 percent), health care (60 percent), Social Security (57 percent) and, indeed, almost everything. By the same polls, between half and two-thirds of Americans regularly feel their taxes are too high; in 2010, a paltry 2 percent thought them too low. Big budget deficits follow logically; but of course, most Americans want those trimmed, too.

The trouble is that, despite superficial support for "deficit reduction" or "tax reform," few Americans would surrender their own benefits, subsidies and tax breaks -- a precondition for success.

I wonder whether we have already reached the tipping point, whether the critical mass of citizens who have a deep-seated understanding of the link between genuine prosperity and limited government can ultimately carry the day against the socialist true-believers and the apolitical, but willfully blind, hordes of ignoramuses – the “low information” voters – who are so easily manipulated by the professional Chicken Littles of the left into believing that the only thing standing between them and penury is ever larger and more expensive government – paid for by someone else, of course.

At this stage, I believe there is the barest chance that we can claw our way back to fiscal sanity in an orderly fashion. I hope we can pull this off, because, ultimately, we will have to deal with reality, one way or the other; either we will manage the process intelligently, or we will wake up one day to find that the well has run dry – and neither the promises of generations of politicians, nor our own blithe expectations will have a shred of relevance.

Monday Movie

The final attack at Rorke’s Drift, from Zulu.

Nice one

I finally - finally - got to take possession of my Uberti New Model Russian top-break revolver yesterday. Here she is (click to enlarge; click twice to really enlarge):



This is a reproduction of the modified S&W Schofield top-break that was sold to the Imperial Russian Army in the 1870s (with some modern tweaks - notably an extractor that pulls the bullets out when you break the gun open - like so:



The purchase of this gun has been an agony of waiting. I ordered it at the same time that I ordered a Ruger .40 caliber pistol. The top-break was back-ordered, and it was supposed to take about a month to come in; however, it came in earlier than expected, and when I got a call from the gun shop, I headed down to pick it up - completely forgetting that, since I had taken possession of the Ruger two weeks previously, I couldn't take the Uberti home for at least another two weeks. I had run afoul of Virginia's 30-day rule: you can only buy one hand gun a month (unless you have a concealed-carry permit, which I don't, but certainly intend to get now). I went down to Virginia Arms last weekend to get the Uberti - the requisite time having elapsed - but the background check, once again, was taking forever, so I made arrangements to pick up the revolver yesterday.

And now, at last, I have it! It's an elegant weapon and a fine piece of craftsmanship. It's chambered for the .44 Russian caliber, a low velocity "cowboy" load which gave me some pause, at first, because I was wondering about the general availability of this offbeat load; however, the ever-trusty Sportsman's Guide has the ammo in stock, so I've ordered a healthy supply.

Can't wait to take this one - and my Stoeger coach gun - down to North Carolina the next time I visit Ma Paco, and start makin' some serious noise out on her homemade firing range.

From the shelves of the Paco library

One of man’s most obvious attributes is curiosity: the urge to poke around, to see what’s on the other side of the hill, and, ultimately, to discover what lies beyond the horizon. And the powerful competitiveness that characterizes many men prompts them to want to be the first, whether it’s sailing west to find the indies, or canoeing up an African river to discover its source or flying an airplane across the Atlantic. Explorer Ernest Shackleton, deprived of an opportunity to be the first man to reach the South Pole, set himself the goal of being the first to traverse the continent of Antarctica. In Endurance, Alfred Lansing skillfully tells the story of Shackleton’s extraordinary expedition of 1914-1916.

It was a failure, but a heroic one. The Endurance, a steam-powered barkentine that had been commissioned by Shackleton for the voyage to Antarctica, left South Georgia Island on December 15, 1914, and became trapped in pack ice in January of the following year off the Caird Coast, in the treacherous, slowly swirling, frozen waters of the Weddell Sea. The Endurance drifted with the ice for months. The book opens with this disaster, in a vivid description of the death throes of the ship:

She was being crushed. Not all at once, but slowly, a little at a time. The pressure of ten million tons of ice was driving in against her sides. And dying as she was, she cried in agony. Her frames and planking, her immense timbers, many of them almost a foot thick, screamed as the killing pressure mounted. And when her timbers could no longer stand the strain, they broke with a report like artillery fire.

In October, Shackleton ordered the ship to be abandoned, and he and his men established a camp on an ice floe. Continuing to drift in a westerly/northwesterly direction, the expedition lived off of the stores they had brought, for what had originally had been intended as a cross-continent trek, plus whatever meat they could get from seals and penguins (they ultimately wound up killing and eating their sled dogs). As their ice floe began to crack up, they moved on via sledge, finally taking to long boats when the ice pack thinned out, in a horrendous journey to Elephant Island, located near the tip of the Palmer Peninsula. From there, Shackleton and a handful of men set out on the open sea in the one more or less sea-worthy boat in order to get back to South Georgia Island, where there was a whaling station at which Shackleton sought to assemble a rescue team to return and pick up the rest of the crew.

The story is one of almost superhuman determination in the face of incredibly bad odds, a drama that unfolds in the most inhospitable and desolate area of the planet, against a background of shattering gales, choking snowstorms and the persistent threat of starvation, drowning and frostbite (as well as the occasional killer whale). Through it all, however, Shackleton and his men maintained a surprising degree of cohesiveness and an indomitable will to survive, their grit and courage propelling them to feats of strength and endurance that left this reader in awe - and chilled to the bone, as well. Reading about places in which temperatures of 34 degrees F are considered something of a heat wave tend to do that to me.

Sunday funnies

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Scientists discover a... gay caveman?

What the...

The suave and talented Smitty is going to be a father!

I say, why wasn't I informed? Do you know how difficult it is to find a fedora that small? Well, no matter. Right now, Smitty is trying to decide on a name. I'm thinking something epic, like Sweyn Forkbeard or Thorfinn Raven Feeder.

Update: Steve Burri has taken care of the fedora problem.

Bumper sticker

Found in the parking lot at the grocery store.

Dang!

Looks like my government-shutdown cruise is off. For now, at least.

Don Surber has a cartoon that pretty much captures my view of a shutdown (except for the "feel bad" part).

What, it’s actually inhabitable now?

Designer Vivivienne Westwood says “Within one generation, Los Angeles will be uninhabitable if people don’t do something about [climate change].” (Click on the link and observe the photo. Westwood is the one who looks like the cowardly lion’s mother.)

More deep thought from this self-appointed priestess of the Church of Cli-Fi:

The world is going to get smaller and be uninhabitable and impossible to live in. The most important thing is for people to inform themselves, because when you inform yourself your behavior changes. All we’ve got is public opinion to help to do something about this. I just try to wear lots of slogans and open my mouth whenever I can.

Thank you, Vivienne, for providing the best definition of a liberal that I’ve ever seen.

Moss-backed earth-torchers, of course, are pushing back. Here’s Richard S. Lindzen, a Professor of Atmospheric Sciences at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology:

The dangers of the (government) policies seem more obviously dangerous than climate change. Climate change has always been with us, and the evidence is that we can adapt to it.

Better stick to fashion design, Vivienne. On the other hand… maybe not.

Victory in Wisconsin

(See Fairly Conservative for the pedigree of this photo)

Happy Feet Friday

Cab Calloway gets some exercise doin’ “The Calloway Boogie”.

Assortment

Hey, I’m all in favor of a government shutdown. It’s the green thing to do.

I’m not sure why the Obama administration is paying out slush-fund money to the Washington Post and CBS. Isn’t this rather an example of buying the cow when you can get the milk for free?

Bob Belvedere says it’s time for we the people to fish or cut bait.

Jeff G. has, in my view, penetrated to the heart of the matter: “So we are here. Victims of our own failure of vigilance. Victims of intellectual laziness and complacency. So the question becomes, what are those of us left who truly believe in the founding principles of this country prepared to do about it?”

Oh, the irony of it all!

Obama on high gas prices: ”Whatever.”

Related:


Thinking of a career change? Richard McEnroe has found a unique opportunity.

Looks like you can't keep a good man down.

Hey, let's start burying people in giant socks

Woolen coffins are the latest thing in deathwear.


"Argyle? A splendid choice, sir! We believe your Uncle Horace - God rest his soul - would have approved heartily."

Obama picks up key endorsement

From public enemy #1.

"We have been hurt more morally (than) physically because of what had happened against us in both deeds and words by you," he wrote. "Despite all this you will always remain our son whatever happened. We still pray that you continue to be president of the U.S.A. We Endeavour and hope that you will gain victory in the new election campaigne."

Heh. "Come to papa, son; all is forgiven."

Hope and regime change, baby!

Hey, who doesn’t like poetry?

A sort of Kiplingesque “tribute” to Oodnadatta, which I assume is not one of Australia’s major tourist destinations (although it looks like one of those hot, dusty places that have always appealed to me).

H/T to the ever-diligent Captain Heinrichs.

The Obama/Paco debates

Transcript of a debate conducted via conference call between President of the United States, Barack Obama, and presidential candidate Paco, leader of the Paquista wing of the Republican Party. Moderator: Brad Smilo of Paco World News Daily.

Smilo: This is Brad Smilo. Paco, are you on the line?

Paco: Yeah, hold a sec, Brad; I’m just finishing up some important private business here [You know what? Hold the onions on that Big Burger, and make it a large order of fries, ok?] All right, Brad, I’m back. Have you got Himself on the line, yet?

Smilo: Let’s see. Yes, it looks like I’ve got somebody on line three. Hello? Mr. President?

Voice: This is Todd Bannerman III, Deputy Assistant to the Chief of White House Remote Communications. The President will be with you momentarily. Sorry for the delay, but he’s been pretty tied up with, er, budget negotiations.

Obama: Fore! [*Whoosh!* *Thwack!*…… *Ker-plunk!*] Damn! Bannerman, go see if you can fish that one out, will you? Here, give me the phone. Hello?

Smilo: Good morning, Mr. President. This is Brad Smilo. As you know, we’ve scheduled a little telephone debate today between you and Republican candidate, Paco.

Obama: Who?

Smilo: Paco, sir. He was one of the first people to announce his candidacy for president on the Republican side.

Obama: Are you sure? My appointments secretary told me I was supposed to be talking with Tim Pawlenty.

Paco: Ahhhmmm, that was probably my mistake. I set up the interview, and I might have said something like we need puh-lenty of time to discuss the issues.

Obama: Mm-hm. So, I guess I was also wrong about Sarah Palin joining us?

Paco: I was talking to your secretary about the recent basketball tournament, and it’s quite possible that I mentioned that Butler University’s determination would ultimately pale in comparison with UConn’s depth and experience.

Obama: This sounds like bait and switch to me.

Paco: You mean like your 2008 campaign strategy?

Obama: Hey! I promised hope and change, and that’s what the people got.

Paco: Well, they’re sure hoping for change now. I mean, just look at the economic situation. We’ve got a huge fiscal crisis, and instead of providing leadership, I heard that you’re heading out of town for a couple of days prior to the likely government shutdown. The battle is joined and you’re just keeping your head down.

Obama: Listen, I…wait…say that again.

Paco: What? About keeping your head down?

Obama: That’s it! That’s why I keep slicing the ball! I’m not keeping my head down. Thanks. Er, and I’m afraid I’ve got to ring off, now. Urgent business.

Smilo: Hello? Hello? Sorry, Paco, looks like we’ve been disconnected.

Paco: Yeah – you, me and about 310 million other citizens. No big deal. At least the debate didn’t last so long that my fries got cold. Oh, hold a minute, Brad. I need to make some campaign promises to the employees here at Five Guys. [Hey, amigos! Vote for Paco! Free green cards for everybody!]

Ecstatic cheers of “Viva, Paco!” and “Arriba con Paquismo!”

The strange silence of Felipe Calderón

One would think that the Mexican president would be visibly outraged over the ATF's gunrunning debacle. So, why isn't he?

Who is Homer Capehart?

And why is he relevant to Paul Ryan’s warnings about the unsustainability of the federal government's reckless spending? Jeffrey Lord at the American Spectator explains, in a fascinating historical analogy.

Monday Movie Follow-up

Robert Avrech, a professional screenwriter and the proprietor of the wonderful blog, Seraphic Secret, has an encyclopedic knowledge of the golden age of Hollywood, which is on display today as he discusses the phenomenon of celebrity endorsements.

But, as usual, his post is about much more than that. Here's an extract from the section on Gable and Lombard:

A proud American patriot—alive today, she would geld Michael Moore—Lombard was one of the first Hollywood actors to barnstorm the country selling war bonds. Tragically, her plane crashed in a rainstorm over her home state of Indiana in 1942. She was 33 years-old. In a brief phone conversation before her fatal flight, Lombard's last words to Gable were,“You better get yourself into this man's army.” Gable, guilty, grief-stricken, and—sigh—drinking heavily, enlisted in the Air Force and though he was far too old, flew several combat missions. Hitler, a man who understood the value of star power, put a million dollar bounty on Gable's head.

Barry tosses halo in ring

That's right, folks. Obama is lovin' the idea of four more years of unlimited golf, plenty of vacation time, and regiments of czars and advisers to make those pesky foreign policy and economic decisions that are so draining for an ultra-cool Lightworker.

Or should that be "light worker" - as in "Presidential position wanted: will consider a little light (White) House work"? Check out the preshizzle's reelection campaign video, courtesy of Ed Morrissey at Hot Air. Ed's got exactly the right take:

Andrew Malcolm offers a humorous take on the ad by comparing it to a DeVry commercial, but the better analogy is to an erectile-dysfunction ad. In both cases, the product’s brand gets advertised without ever explicitly saying what exactly it does. Instead, we get plenty of warm and soft-focus cinematography along with knowing glances and a slightly self-conscious cast. And in both cases, prolonged effect is potentially dangerous and needs intervention from people who know better.

"I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Say, anybody else hear a train whistle?"

Monday movie

The haunting opening scenes from M.

Not related, but fascinating: here's a list of goofs from Casablanca.

Sunday funnies

* * * * * * * * * * *

TimT is standing in the poets' corner.

There will be turd sandwiches and rumors of turd sandwiches

Inspiring rhetoric from our president.


"Looks like a plan!"

Canadian election

According to a rumor from Robert of Ottawa, there's one going on right now coming up soon.

Bill Maher, RIP

Paco World News Daily (PWN’d), April 1, 2011

Scrotum-faced provocateur Bill Maher called Chuck Norris a c**t during a live interview on Maher’s most recent – and last - broadcast of “Real Time”. It is thought that Norris roundhouse-kicked Maher into the next state; however, Norris, who was briefly taken into custody, was later released due to the fact that everybody in the studio audience, as well as everyone in the United States who was watching the program on television, claimed to have not seen a thing.

Today’s Chuck Norris fact: Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

Profiles in “courage”

Probably the most absurd and offensive analogy of the year (so far).

I guarantee: the first future opponent of this ass hat - whether Republican in the general election or Democrat in the primary – to put together a video showing him fleeing across the state line, and barreling down the road to the strains of “The Ballad of the Green Berets”, wins hands down.

Hate speech laws protect those who hate free speech

Australian columnist Andrew Bolt to face "heresy" trial.

H/T: Instapundit