"There are countless horrible things happening all over the world and horrible people prospering, but we must never allow them to disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to sabotage and annoy them whenever possible." -Auberon Waugh
Friday, March 8, 2024
Or, you could have just brought back glass bottles with steel screw-on caps
But then, the past is a bad place, by your reckoning, so...
...including a difficult-to-recycle silicone material for the valve that controls how much ketchup comes out...
I've never been a big fan of that design. At first it works, but soon it stops working right and you have to keep applying pressure until it shoots out at about 100mph and splatters everywhere.
I agree with Paco, the old glass bottles and steel cap work fine if you shake'em first.
I used to wonder at everyone pounding the bottom of their upended catsup (er... ketchup) bottles. It never worked as intended. When I was a kid, somebody showed me a trick... tilt the bottle over your food, and insert the knife blade into the neck. You get a nice controllable flow.
Pounding the bottom eventually get s major spurt which covers half your plate and maybe the sleeve of whoever is sitting next to you.
Ma Paco always told us not to pound the bottom of the bottle, but to slap the neck. It usually worked, but I like the knife trick better.
One of the funniest things I ever saw: a friend and I were having lunch at a Dairy Queen, probably 50 years ago, and he picked up the round, plastic ketchup bottle to squirt some on his hamburger. I was busy putting salt on my fries, when I heard something that sounded like a loud, wet fart (recollect, if you can, the sound you always heard whenever Jerry hit Tom in the face with a pie). When I looked up, there was my friend, stunned, still holding the ketchup bottle, with ketchup all over his face and shirt. I imagine there was a ketchup clog in the squirter. Couldn't. Stop. Laughing.
Sounds like a research/design program managed by the federal government.
ReplyDeleteWhy do I suspect that these new recyclable tops will leach into the ketchup ... and also come loose and dump half the bottle on your fries?
ReplyDelete...including a difficult-to-recycle silicone material for the valve that controls how much ketchup comes out...
ReplyDeleteI've never been a big fan of that design. At first it works, but soon it stops working right and you have to keep applying pressure until it shoots out at about 100mph and splatters everywhere.
I agree with Paco, the old glass bottles and steel cap work fine if you shake'em first.
I used to wonder at everyone pounding the bottom of their upended catsup (er... ketchup) bottles. It never worked as intended. When I was a kid, somebody showed me a trick... tilt the bottle over your food, and insert the knife blade into the neck. You get a nice controllable flow.
ReplyDeletePounding the bottom eventually get s major spurt which covers half your plate and maybe the sleeve of whoever is sitting next to you.
Ma Paco always told us not to pound the bottom of the bottle, but to slap the neck. It usually worked, but I like the knife trick better.
ReplyDeleteOne of the funniest things I ever saw: a friend and I were having lunch at a Dairy Queen, probably 50 years ago, and he picked up the round, plastic ketchup bottle to squirt some on his hamburger. I was busy putting salt on my fries, when I heard something that sounded like a loud, wet fart (recollect, if you can, the sound you always heard whenever Jerry hit Tom in the face with a pie). When I looked up, there was my friend, stunned, still holding the ketchup bottle, with ketchup all over his face and shirt. I imagine there was a ketchup clog in the squirter. Couldn't. Stop. Laughing.
For old style glass bottles: slap the side. Repeat as necessary.
ReplyDeleteYeah, Ma Paco said right where the neck joins the wide, lower part of the bottle was the sweet spot.
ReplyDelete